I went to Russia last year to meet a very special girl. She is 37 and I’m 53 now. I had the best time of my life, and I have found the girl I want to marry. I still remember the places we went to, and the good times we had. I also remember the night before I had to leave her. As we were laying next to each other in the dark, my arm around her, I felt the tear drops falling. She didn’t make any sounds, but I know she was hurting. She says she loves me very much, and I love her too. She also tells me that if I can’t wait for her, I should find someone else closer. I don’t want any one else. All I want, is to be with her. Could she be telling me that she doesn’t want to wait? I hope not.
Now we are waiting for the fiancée visa, and I know it is a long process. I sent the papers to immigration in May, and they said that it could take up to 6 months. After that, if everything is OK, she will have to go to Moscow to be interviewed at the US embassy there. I have heard that they will try to trick her, so she will say something wrong and not get the visa. Is this true? Is there something we should know before she goes in for the interview?
Thank You for any help you can give us.
A Russian Woman who you’ve been dating that is 37 years old is highly unlikely to screw with you. It’s just the opposite I’m sure. She knows that you are a very rare find in her world. A prince from a far away land that’s come to love her in her lonely part of the world.
The fact that she’s concerned that you are waiting too long for her only tells me one thing.. that she deeply cares and loves you UNCONDITIONALLY.
Most of us Men have never had the experience of being loved on this level… When a Woman will love you no matter what decision you make or what path you choose. This is the rarest find in the world and the silent tears of sadness that she had at your parting is only a reflection of her attempt to be strong and to prepare herself for the worst (if it happens) but to still hold out hope and have the ability to feel love in her life.
That is a very tough act for any woman to go through but I’ve seen incredible emotional strength and fortitude in these women that I have never seen anywhere else. My gut tells me that she’s holding her breath for you Allen.
And if need be she might hold it for the rest of her life..
As far as the embassy deal is concerned I don’t know of any tricks but I do know that with this latest International Marriage Agency Law that was just passed they may ask her if she has seen or is aware of any past criminal history or any divorce history that you may have. This is an outrageous law that was snuck through Congress and I urge you guys to visit this site and to voice you opposition to it. In any case if you guys met before it became law then no problem. If not.. then the embassy is supposed to ask her if she’s been notified of your history and if she says no then they might stall her paperwork till it’s cleared up..
That is the only potential pitfall that I’ve heard of.. other then that it’s supposed to be a pretty straight forward deal.
Good Luck and Keep us updated!
my name is Bob and I live in the DC area. I’m 46, single, never married and I’ve been looking all over the net for information about Russian women and I finally found it. Thanks for your good informative work! You have filled a huge void out there because only men truly understand men. Since I was a young boy, I always envisioned myself getting married in my 40s or 50s to a girl in her 20s.I have a story I can relate to you and maybe the blog readers, but I don’t know where to respond, so I am sending you this email.
I put an ad on a website looking for roommates to rent out a spare bedroom I had and as it turned out, to my pleasant surprise, I found AK, a Russian student here for the summer. I emailed her and said I studied Russian History in college and it would be cool to have her as my roommate. She asked if her cousin could stay here too, that was MK. When I saw her, I said sure! I don’t need to explain, do I? They were both 21 at the time and I was very impressed with their beauty, strength, work ethic, personalities, English skills, basically everything about them.
I had 2 lovely young girls I could hang out with when we weren’t working. All my friends were jealous of me. I have my own business and they both took waitressing jobs downtown. They were here for 3 months and I ended up having the best time of my life with them! We became good friends only, no romance or sex. I had to restrain myself being around them! They are not into casual sex at all. I acted like an ambassador of the U.S. This turned out to be the best way to act.
I showed them all the sights of DC, took them to the beach in Delaware and we all had a great time. I had heard about Russian women before but I had no idea I would become such good friends with them. I learned a lot from them. They told me I was the best person they met here the entire time they were here and invited me to visit them in Russia. This was 2003. They live in southern Russia in the Black Sea area. I miss them a lot. We still stay in touch by phone and email.
Then, last year, 2005, since they trusted me, AK’s younger sister, TK, came to stay with me for the whole summer, 4 months. She was 20 and had her 21st birthday while she was here. She is even more beautiful than her sister. Since I had become good friends with AK, I told her she could stay here for free. This time I had moved and only had a couch she could sleep on. She never complained! I helped her get oriented and helped her feel at home. TK and I spent a lot of time together before she found a waitressing job downtown. I ended up falling in love with the girl! I took her to see New York and then sadly, I put her on the plane back to Russia. I wanted to get on that plane so bad! It was her first time abroad. She has a boyfriend back in Russia. I really miss TK. It was even better than the time I had in 2003!
I asked all 3 of these girls to marry me and they understand I need a wife. I am a fairly attractive guy but I never really wanted to marry an American girl. They have agreed to introduce me to other girls when I go to Russia. TK said her Mom has a girl she wants to introduce me to. I did a lot for these girls when they were here and they appreciate that. I must go to Russia to visit them. I have been to Europe 6 times but I haven’t been to Russia yet.
I’m glad I’m not one of those guys looking for a Russian wife on a website. Meeting the Russian girls here on student work visas for the summer, becoming friends with them, helping them and being invited to visit them and be introduced to other girls seems like a good way to go. This all happened out of the blue for me and I am convinced I must go to Russia! Time is running out for me to get there this year. I feel like dropping everything and just doing it! I admit, it’s a little intimidating to fly all they way there and not knowing how to speak Russian and it’s very expensive.
I have been learning what I need to do to go to Russia. I need an invitation which has to be mailed from their police station before I can apply for a visa and stay with them while I am there. If you stay in a hotel, the hotel gives you the invitation. You can only stay for 30 days. The visa application is like a job application. It’s not at all like jumping on a plane to Europe I have found out. There is so much to learn and do. What do you think about the women of the Black Sea area? What do you think about Novorossiysk, Anapa, Sochi and Krosnodar? Most people have never heard of these places. What’s the best way to fly there? Should I fly Aeroflot? Any other advise you can give would be appreciated.
I felt like I was man alone out there, but after reading your website I feel like a new man now!
Thanks! I hope you enjoyed my story.
I loved your story and thanks for the compliment.
Bob I hate to say this to you… but next time God smiles on you and decides to drop the next beautiful young Russian girl into your home (which by the way is more then a Million to One chance in a lifetime)..
Do Everyone a BIG FAVOR and DON’T BE AFRAID to PURSUE a ROMANCE with her!
Ouch.. I know that’s gotta hurt especially given all the time you’ve had with them.
There’s an old saying in Russia that applies to your situation and I wish you knew it while you had these girls in your presence.
“In Russia, it’s the Men that choose the Women and not the other way around..”
Now keep in mind I’m not saying you can pull a caveman on any of these girls and drag her by the hair back to your cave.. No you have to consistently Romance them to the point where as a girlfriend of mine says she will break down her resistance and let’s you into her heart. Just make sure it’s the right girl with good character but in your case I don’t think that’s an issue with any of the THREE Girls you’ve lived with!
Jezus.. some guys like you and my Good Ol’ Boy Will down in Houston have all the Luck eh?
You guys didn’t have to brave -40 degree Siberian Winters like I have in order to gain Russian Women ENLIGHTENMENT!
Now the GOOD NEWS is that you already have a KILLER Social Network ready to go which most of the guys reading this post would DIE for if they had the chance. Do NOT waste your incredibly good fortune and your FIRST HAND Knowledge with what these women are like. Just jump on Aeroflot and get you butt over here.
Oh an one more thing.. If you need some additional motivation to make the jump just put this into your head.. Tourists go to Europe.. Real Men go to Russia.. 😉
The Black Sea area will be just fine for you.. so don’t worry. I used to have a girlfriend from Sochi and she was if you can believe it a beautiful and exotic Las Vegas style showgirl traveling with a Circus! Anyways Sochi is just ONE of the many paradises for Women that exists in Russia and the FSU.
Here’s some advice. If you want to stay longer then Sochi is a cool place because once your 30 day visa is up.. just hop over the border to the Ukraine and go to the Russian Embassy in Kiev to get another Visa and the go back to Russia. As an American citizen you don’t need a Visa to get into the Ukraine so it should all be a piece of cake.
Bob the only problem you will have once you come to Russia is this…
YOU WON’T WANT TO GO BACK TO THE US..
Have you ever seen the movie Star Trek Generations? You know the first time we get to see Picard and Kirk together on the big screen? Remember the bad guy in that movie played by Malcom McDonald.. He was this evil scientist that had lived in the cosmic paradise called the Nexus and by accident he was kicked out.. So he figured that the only way he could get back into it was to destroy entire solar systems with a bomb he invented that would make the Sun go Supernova? Well wanting to get back into Russia is not QUITE that extreme but I’m sure you get the point.
I’ve seen this desire to come back repeatedly time and time again with EVERY guy whose ever come here from the States. Take your awesome experience with having 3 beautiful Russian girls in your home and multiply that by a factor of a thousand and you will start to get an idea. Just be careful not to fall into the “Choice Paralysis” trap that I talked about in my recent post and try to stay focused.
Now saying all of this.. now that you’ve gained great enjoyment and insight from my site and hopefully this reply I would like for you to return the good karma and do the following..
GO FORTH AND SPREAD THY WORD TO YOUR FELLOW BROTHERS WHO HAVE NOT YET SEEN THE LIGHT..
Believe me magical things will happen if you do and also it will make your trip much easier if you team up with some other guys just for moral support or even for an actual trip.
I shouldn’t have to remind you to take lots of pictures when you go but I will remind you to share them here!
Hi from Switzerland!
Sometimes there are strange coincidences. I just came back from my first trip to Russia and the girl who was taking care of the house while I was away asked me about blogs (she wanted to open one). Since I was not familiar with that topic we took googles help and for whatever reason your site showed up. What a revelation! I took the trip to Moscow (and St.Petersburg) because I had a free ticket and did not even think about Russian girls (wanted to visit museums :-)), but I met a beautiful what you would call elder woman (she just got 30 while I was there) which somehow is ok on my side because I am 26 years older. Your descriptions fit one to one. Immediately after I came home I applied for a multiple entry visa and started private lessons in Russian. Not because I fell terrible in love with that girl (it might happen though:)), but because I could feel what you said about Russian women. Great job! maybe someday we meet somewhere in Russia. Until than I stay tuned.
You only went to Russia to go to visit the Museums??
Wow what kind of water do you drink in Switzerland my friend? 🙂
I like your description of Russian women and how it only took one trip for you to want to get back AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. (see previous post)
But ya.. I think I understand what you are talking about. All it takes is one taste doesn’t it? One small experience with a 26 year old girl from St. Petersburg and as we say in America.. It was all over for you.. Cause right at that moment.. magic happened.. AND YOU KNEW what I’ve been trying to describe to all of you guys all along.
I also loved the way you described just being in Russia and not falling in love with any particular girl. You said you could “FEEL” what I was saying about Russian Women to be true. Gentlemen when you come here this “FEELING” will happen to all of you I guarantee it. And some mysterious part of your manly brain will click and come alive and just simply say.. “This is it..”
Good for you Klaus.. Hope to hear from you soon and please tell those other poor friends of yours in Switzerland to stop drinking that strange water you have! 😉
My name is Greg from Sydney, Australia. I just wanted to share my recent experience of traveling to the Russian Federation to meet a woman i’d been communicating with for several months. I’d never been out of Australia in my life, so to travel for like 40hrs to the other side of the world to ‘meet’ this woman i’ve been having wonderful written communications with was a pretty huge step for me to take! Sad thing is, it went pear shaped almost immediately after meeting her! After arriving early hours of the morning in Yekaterinburg after so many hours of flying and ‘waiting’ for connections, a 400ruble cab ride from Koltsovo airport and i was at my ‘hotel’ where reception couldn’t speak English, my cabbie couldn’t speak English and all i wanted to do is get my room and finally sleep! I had a couple of hours sleep and feeling ‘reasonably’ refreshed excitedly made contact by phone with the ‘agency’ to see about meeting my lady that afternoon!
She arrived at the office after me – seemed somewhat cold and aloof. The office manager/translator accompanied us to dinner etc. Hard to tell if it went well, as this woman i ‘thought i knew’ showed no emotion – NOTHING! Anyway, I was to meet her again the next day, and long story short, she bailed and gave some poor excuse as to why she couldn’t make it – then virtually made herself uncontactable and if contact was made with her by the agency, she would not explain why she became like this and was treating me this way! A completely different person to the ‘words’ she wrote in her letters….
One of the ‘lame excuses’ she apparently told the agency (other than she has too much work) was that she didn’t realize how difficult it would be in expressing herself and neither of us understanding the other ones words – Now as an intelligent person, she knew that i knew very little russian before i even booked a plane ticket! Anyway, i tried to make the best of my time in Yekaterinburg, and many rubles/Euros later had met more of their ‘catalogue’ but really found the women to be judgmental and or not what their pictures portrayed.
During this time, the agencies young translator often accompanied me on my ‘tours’ that i’d chosen to go on, and was someone i felt somewhat attracted to – She is in her early 20’s , petite and very feminine, down to earth, absolutely gorgeous and sounds so sweet and sexy – her voice when she speaks in English. I often found myself just wanting to take hold of HER hand when on the day tours with her. I’ve taken some lovely photographs of her, and i could kick myself, because in all the time i was there, i realized after i left Russia she is the one who makes my heart beat faster and whose smile melts me! I’ve written a couple of emails to her since arriving back in Sydney, and she has written me saying that my emails are always welcome! She has given me her personal email address to write her.
My last email to her i wrote honestly about how i felt about her, and that i realized my heart was taking me in a direction towards her and that the heart knows what the heart wants – well, i haven’t heard from her since i wrote that and i’m at a loss as to what to do!! I don’t want to scare her, but i’d already hinted at my feelings for her (very lightly) in other email by saying how i wished i had taken hold of her hand when i was with her for a day excursion. I think she is wonderful, and even though i am in my 40’s, i want to completely win this girls heart!!! I’ve been to Russia, and i want to return and hopefully to be with Tanya! Do i send her flowers? What should i do?
Well, that’s my story….hope i haven’t bored you with it and would appreciate your thoughts and any help for me to win Tanya’s heart and show her that i care very much for her without scaring her and losing her forever. All the pictures in the agencies catalogue and the ‘princess’ i traveled there for who dumped on me – yet right under my nose was Tanya!
Thank you for any advice you may be able to offer me to win Tanya’s heart….
I can tell your heart is really into this girl Tanya and you want to win her over to you and I understand. Now before I get too deeply into this I want you to realize ONE THING. No matter what happens you’ve already scored a HUGE Victory by going to Russia. Because I KNOW and YOU KNOW that the search for your heart and the answer to your soul is HERE. And with this comes much Peace because I’m sure you WILL NEVER look at Australian girls the same way again. So I’m sure that in many ways you are already a FREE MAN.
Ok the first thing I want to tell you is that I can’t read Tanya’s mind and I have very little information to go off given her lack of response to you. However there are some potential scenario’s here.
Keep in mind that it is very common for guys to come to Russia and to fall in love with their interpreter! I mean what else is going to happen when you put a hot young Russian Girl who speaks good English together with a Western Man who’s never been to Russia before and who is looking for a wife! It’s like a EXPLOSIVE Emotional Chain Reaction just waiting to happen on one side or the other.
Now saying this.. having visiting guys coming into town and falling in love with her MAYBE a common event for her due to what I just described. This is one possibility. She maybe thinking “OK.. here’s another nice guy falling for me.. and i don’t know what to do about it…”
Either way you have NOTHING to lose by pursuing it to the point of finding out what the bottom line is because either she will tell you she’s not interested.. OR she is quietly looking for your leadership to see how strong you are as a MAN in pursuing her. Or in other words..
Are you worthy for her Love?
I’ll tell you this. Russian Girls are well aware of guys floating around saying.. “I love you..” all the time so they are especially sensitive to this in wanting to know if this is just a bunch of BS or not. If you really want to take the chance and roll the dice with this girl then by all means do it and see where it leads. But when you roll the dice you will need to dedicate yourself to her so she will see it and believe it. Either way you choose you will either GAIN HER or you will GAIN VALUABLE PRACTICE and Experience which will serve you well in the future.
There is an old saying that every Russian woman knows and is totally spot on for this situation.. and I want you to really absorb this.
“Men fall in love with their eyes.. while Women fall in love with their ears.”
Get it? Good..
Now go out and impress her by learning some Russian phrases. Here are some good one to start with.
I think about you… “Ya duma-you o Te-bya”
You are very beautiful… “Tee O-cheey Kra-see-Vaya”
Practice saying this in a very romantic way.. Hell if you have a pet cat then practice it on your cat first and then see how it responds! 🙂
Now go get a calling card that allows you to call Russia for cheap and surprise her with a phone call.
Russian Women LOVE surprises.. So the more surprises you can lay on her the better the odds are that you will win her over.
Men always remember this..
There ARE NO PENALTIES for being Romantic with a Russian Woman as opposed to a Western Woman. Western Woman will often flat out scorn or ridicule you with the slightest hint of interest on your part.
THIS will NOT happen with a Russian Girl.
When Russian girls receive any kind of sincere romance it’s always warmly accepted even if she doesn’t see the man initially as a romantic interest! Romance is a big and special deal here beyond what most men can possibly imagine so that’s why I’ve said before that for most of you guys it’s time to dust off those old ways of doing courtship and start bringing them out of retirement and into active duty again.
Anyways I think I’ve given you enough ammunition to play with for now.. Just be careful where you point that Gun! 😉
PS. Oh and one more thing.. You’ve learned a very valuable lesson concerning what you thought a girl was like through her letters and what she was like in real life. 80/20 rule strikes again.. Only rely on letters as 20% of the courtship process and rely on actual meetings as 80%. The interesting thing about your experience is that you experienced both with 2 different women! Hopefully this is something you are not likely to forget from now on..