Don’t ask me where I heard this..
And it could be a total rumor for all I know..
But someone mentioned that Justin Timberlake was actually spotted in Belarus looking for a Girlfriend.
Now this is one of those things that on one hand surprises me.. but as you can guess on the other hand it dosen’t.
I assumed (and I’m sure most people would as well) that a young Man who was Britney Spear’s ex-boyfriend and a current Pop-Star Icon would be awash with the kind of female attention that would normally be reserved for… well guys like him..
When I heard this I started to remember an interesting event that happened to myself about 4 years ago…
For most Guys the decision to come to Russia is not one of those things that they just wake up to one morning with a light bulb shining above their heads. It’s a slow gradual process of learning, digesting and realization.
And this is certainly something that I understand well.
You’ll find that with most Men it takes about 6 months to a year for them to process the benefits vs. the risks before they really do wake up one day and say..
“This is what I’m going to do..”
Often times this takes a few “catalytic events” to happen before they finally smell the coffee and take a sip.
For me.. one of those key moments happened about 6 months before I came to Russia.
I was in a popular hang-out in Los Gatos called Mountain Charlies enjoying the Wednesday Night Karaoke Contest. Through some mutual friends I met a new acquaintance whom I’ll call Dave.
Dave had the classic California Surfer and Movie Star good looks.. Quite frankly this guy could literally have put Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt to shame. Blond, Tanned and Trim along with a down to earth and confident personality to match.
Dave was working for a Silicon Valley firm that had recently delivered an IPO and he was sitting pretty once again.. Because it turns out that this was the 2nd IPO within his career as a software engineer. The first one allowed him to purchase a beautiful hillside Los Gatos home along with his Ferrari Dream Car.. Not bad for a guy who was only 34 eh?
This was one of those guys who in my mind CLEARLY had it all and I was happy for him..
But Dave wasn’t happy. He had broken up with his girlfriend about a year prior and was now neck deep into the “Dating Circuit”. When Dave explained his situation you could hear the frustration and disillusionment in his voice.
“I can’t find any good girls..”
Now this seemed a bit ironic at the time given the fact that we were surrounded by more then a few young women in this club. So I simply asked him..
“Dave, you mean to tell me with all the great things going on in your life that you can’t find some beautiful girl who just totally digs you?”
He stared at his pint of Sam Adams.. took a long sip and sighed..
“I’ve dated lots of girls.. and so far the only ones that I’ve been out with have only acted like psychos or sluts… and I don’t want to end up with that for the rest of my life..”
I started thinking to myself.. How could a handsome, rich, young, outgoing guy like this end up in this situation?
This was not the kind of person who stayed at home as some socially un-acceptable hermit.. this guy was motivated in his life and he was a real go-getter.. he had to be in order to end up with the success he’s created for himself.
So what was it?
It certainly wasn’t because of his lack of “characteristics”..
Perhaps it was just bad “timing”..
Or just maybe.. it had something to do with being in a “bad” place..
Yup.. that looks like the culprit to me..
And this culprit certainly matched my own experiences in my home land.
So here before me.. In the form of a great guy with whom I was having a beer with..
Was the smoking gun I was looking for..
The smoking gun that simply indicated..
That there was NO WAY any Woman could by any stretch of the imagination call this guy a “Loser”.
So therefore a sad but emerging truth was becoming undeniable and a personal “catalytic event” was born.
“No.” I quietly thought to myself..
“It’s just the opposite.”
(to read part 1 click here)