Many years ago when I was back in California I was driving up to a seminar and had volunteered to pick up another lady on a car pool list who was also attending it.
Let’s call this Woman “Carol”.
Carol looked like she was in her early to mid 40’s. Typical nature-mama look with disheveled clothes, tangled hair and a face that had an equally confused expression.
Frail and depressed were the two words that came to mind as I saw her for the first time.
After our greetings and introductions we later on settled into a conversation about Men, Women and Relationships..
Carol was sad and upset as she talked in a surprisingly candid and neurotic tone when she said…
I don’t understand why Men don’t want me anymore..
When I was a teenager in the 70’s I was a hot little girl and every man wanted me and I could completely do as I pleased. I could get him to buy me drinks, take me out for expensive dates, and buy me gifts. And then I could get rid of him and another Man would quickly do the same. But now that doesn’t happen anymore..
Now since I had vivid memories of being on the receiving end of this kind of evil sexual manipulation..
I just wanted to stop the car and say..
You Stupid Bitch!
You got what you deserved.. you wasted the best years of your life throwing Men out like pieces of trash when you should have used that precious time to find someone who would love you for the rest of your days.. You played with fire and now you’re going to pay the price until you are old and gray..
Part of me REALLY wished that I would have said that to her..
But the other part of me just said to relax and to let an unforgiving Mother Nature do the talking for me instead. As each passing year would creep forward for her it was obvious that Carol was condemned to a prison from which there was no escape.
It’s because she made the WORST Judgment a Woman can do in her Life..
She FAILED to realize that Lasting Love is MUCH MORE Valuable and HARDER to Find then any number of Men with a few more Dollars in their pockets.
However there was simply no need for me to tell her this important truth..
Because my silent response was far more punishing to her then what my words could ever say.
For all intensive purposes this woman had become addicted to what I call the “Prostitute’s Game”.
She foolishly thought that the free ride for her as a Woman would last forever..
She was like the jaded prostitute who judged all Men only by the size of their wallets and in doing this she actually turned herself into a mere commodity.
A commodity that was already cheap to start with.. but now at this point in her life even when it was “free” there were no more men willing to accept it.
(Maybe except for the bi-polar, alcoholic, and nearly homeless artist that she claimed she had sex with 6 months previously)
Now unfortunately there are large numbers of materialistic women around the world and in Russia who fit this description. I met one the other day who was trying to impress me with how much of a “Queen” she thought she was because of her looks and it reminded me of Carol’s story.
On one hand it’s hilarious to see foolish Women acting this way..
But on the other hand it’s a total tragedy.
Because they always assume that they will stay young and beautiful forever. And they just never consider the future which is always closer then they think when their looks and hopes have faded with the wind.
It reminds me of an airplane that is dropping into a steep dive.
- At what point does the pilot need to safely pull up before he crashes into the ground?
- At what point in these Women’s lives do they cross the point of no return..
- At what point in their “fun” and exploitative lifestyle did they just lose the last chance to have a Good Man in their life..
- Just who was this remaining Good Man who stepped onto the last train leaving her station when she thought that more would come..
Mother Nature can be so often cruel and unforgiving.
So many people just never realize the exact moment they consign their lives to Hell when it happens..
And insidiously enough for them.. it is usually within the addictive haze of some fleeting experience of “freedom and fun” that this moment actually happens.
Or in other words.. she just can’t stop doing it because she like it way too much.
(Kinda like how an addiction to cigarettes can kill you many years after your enjoyment of smoking them is done..)
And so many women like Carol never realize it until it’s just way too late.
In the US and in the West this point of no return for a Woman is typically somewhere in her mid to late 30’s.
While in the unforgiving and merciless dating environment that Russian Women face over here.. this range is more between her mid 20’s to early 30’s.
So especially when I see a small percentage of Russian Girls in their early to mid 20’s playing this exploitative game against Men..
A part of me just want’s to scream at them..
Hey you STUPID Girl!
Don’t you know that TIME is NOT on your side as a Woman! Keep on playing this game and you will be forced to play it FOREVER!
But then common sense takes over as I take a deep breath.. exhale.. and shut my lips..
And again I allow Mother Nature to take over and to speak for me with her silence..
A silence that speaks with so much more darkness and eloquence…
Like it did on that drive with Carol so many years ago.
December 21, 2006 at 6:22 pm
What goes around comes around. I’ll bet you that she is one of those women that said men are immature,because they did not play her games,and all the time she was sucking her own thumb.
December 21, 2006 at 7:00 pm
Sounds like my ex-wife.
When women appreciate and treasure their men, you can bet that we’ll stick around for the long haul, through thick and thin, through the laughter and the tears and through wrinkles and arthritis.
I can’t think of any American or Western woman that would do this.
December 21, 2006 at 8:10 pm
It is certainly an amazing thing to witness this at so many levels with the women I deal with day to day. It is sad in so many ways to watch this happening, yet the people involved seem to have no clue what is they have allowed to happen to themselves, and then seek someone to blame. It is NEVER their fault. Hence to men become the target.
😦
Canajun
December 21, 2006 at 9:49 pm
WOW! Great article!
I can really relate on many different levels! I worked for Penthouse for a year or so after the big corporations took over the broadcasting business, so I worked with many women like her(the one in your article) only, they were like “her” by 28, not 40.
Also, she almost sounds like my current girlfriend who although has assets of over a million plus, isn’t happy and I have to live with…”I’ll call ya back,” because she is so busy. I have been hearing that for about a year now and the nooky nooky new new…is only a memory!
Great writing and great story! Funny thing for me now, I seem to have a lot of younger women in my life that just want to hang out and actually enjoy my stories about the great days of “Rock N Roll and the Radio business. They seem to be somewhat of a, “Breed apart,” from the “kind” you are writing about.
Now that I am about to start a NEW ADVENTURE and see my life being better than it’s ever been before, I value YOUR perspective on women and AMERICAN WOMEN! You seem to be,”more than accurate,” with your conclusions!
On our site we have an interesting article about Men and Women too. We went to the less
serious lighter side of things,which of course was just for fun and NOT for true thought. I guess on a subconscious level it was an interesting way to… “not deal with the real issues,” as you have so skillfully pointed out
December 21, 2006 at 10:02 pm
That WAS my ex-wife, to the last detail Kzarz. Like Bill said, what comes around, goes around!
Taras
December 21, 2006 at 10:36 pm
This woman “Carol” must be the same one riding with me last week, the confession and self pity were exactly the same. And she is still trying to manipulate her current relationship in her 50’s.
December 22, 2006 at 1:14 am
Today I was having lunch with my buddy and we noticed just how many overweight women there were, in the range of 80% or so. I also took note of the rare, wait, very rare, attractive, well-dressed woman walking by with her nose up high. I said to my buddy, “Here are the choices we have as American men—fat women who pile on the extra salad dressing who are delusional about the men they think want them or perhaps a rare attractive woman who can smell a thick wallet five miles away against the wind.” Finally it hit me that my pretty Ukrainian bride will be here with me in one month. There is hope after all. Great article! Truer words have never been spoken.
December 22, 2006 at 6:07 am
Hello Bill Howard and mrjoeo..
Welcome aboard guys.. I really appreciate your feedback on this post. Please spread the word and turn your buddies on to this. Or you can even forward this post to a few women in your life who need to read it.. Yes I know it’s a little evil.. but hey it might do them some good. 😉 GL
December 22, 2006 at 6:09 am
Hey there EE. 🙂
Thanks for your own personal story. Interesting gig I’m sure working for Penthouse of all places. So yeah I’m sure this game was always in full swing over there. Please grace us with more of your own stories my Man.. It’s not just the young girls that dig it. 😉 GL
December 22, 2006 at 4:44 pm
This post just sums up the main theme of the small 100-page book, “Sex-ploytation” by Matthew Fitzgerald. The author wrote about how women become prostitutes or whores using her looks and her vagina to manipulate men to get what she wants.
The standard questions those kind of women initially ask when you meet them for the first time are like those: “What do you do for living?”, “What kind of car do you drive?” and so on to analyze your financial status. They eventually look at your shoes. They have so strong sense of money-stiffing. If they smell money in you no matter how small or big, they’d chase all over you. It’s better to stay alert and know when to escape when you sense something going to happen.
Another wonderful post from RW_Man. Keep up the great work!
December 22, 2006 at 5:47 pm
That book should be required reading for boys in this trainwreck of a country.
Taras
December 22, 2006 at 7:00 pm
Hi! it’s me EE
For those that couldn’t find the…
*Stories Sung To The Tune of…”Men and Women”
Just click on my name and write in..
men and women in the search bar under the calender.
Scroll down and you will see the story along
with a set of studio controls that … “says it all”
We get several hits a day from this site!
Thanks!
Many think America is free, but our former site was yanked off the internet for being too political!
We went to the site one day to find it gone along with all data and when we contacted the server, it was explained they couldn’t take the threats and letters from Judges and Lawyers
THE TRUTH HURTS!
Just like THIS site tells the Real Truth!
We are still getting threats!
Quite frankly we are not sure how much longer we will be allowed our freedom of speech.
Thank god we are in touch daily with the best attorneys money can buy.
If we had no money, we would ALL be in the Hoosgow!
So there is FREEDOM in America but it comes with a price!
December 23, 2006 at 2:03 am
I am shocked and appalled at the actions of these prostitutes. They ARE prostitutes. They ARE prostitutes. They are dirty filthy prostitutes. The lawyers are the pimps because the lawyers get a slice of the cash whenever the prostitutes decide to marry somebody and then divorce them in order to get their “prostitution fee”. I swear the second I get out of that miserable college I am going to move straight to Russia right away. I want to move to the best Siberian town.
–Luke Skywalker.
December 23, 2006 at 6:27 pm
Calm down Luke, the Force shall be with you, ALWAYS.
I can understand your frustration perhaps alittle, but keep your wits and your mind on YOUR future. What’s done is done. Move on or get off.
😉
Obiwan (Canajun)
🙂
December 23, 2006 at 6:39 pm
It’s funny how you bring up that the “age of no return” is younger in Russia. I met a girl when I was in Volgograd. She was 31 and complaining that she had missed her opportunity in Russia to get married and that all the good men were taken.
In America, it wouldn’t be the case. But, in Russia, I had to concede that she had a point.
December 23, 2006 at 8:04 pm
I am an instructor at a midwest univesity and I have a slightly similar story. I met a visitin faculty from Russia in her late 20s. This woman (Anna Leonard Brutman) tried to play me like a fool after our first date. She started to request things such as lending her my car after the first date. That sounded the alarm in my head. After our second date, it became apparent to me that she is one of those that prey on men’s wallet and the part of our brain controlled by our penis. I broke it of with her after the second date.
Later I learned from a colleague that after I broke it off with her, she started to date this retired person in his late 60s and boasts to other people in her department about how he lend her his car and buy her expensive things while at the sametime complain how he’s so old.
I just hope this older gentlemen would realize if he has not already that she is playing him for his wallet and save some of his hard earned retirement fund.
December 23, 2006 at 8:18 pm
That’s nothing, in the Philippines a woman is an “old maid” at age 24.
The USA can provide a great social life for middle-aged women, as long as they take care of themselves. Hell, I think that I see more attractive 40-year-old women than attractive 20-year-old women in this country.
December 23, 2006 at 8:19 pm
Not to complain, but how come GL is never online on that MEEB “Russia Live” thing on the front of the website? It isn’t necessary for him to be online a lot, but if GL could say every once in a while: (for example) “Ok guys, I am going to be online on the MEEB from 4:00 to 5:00 PM this Wednesday afternoon,” then that would be a great opportunity for us to all plan on our calendars to be able to talk to GL directly on the MEEB.
Canajun,
You have hit upon an area in which you guys are much stronger than I am (due to the fact that, as Taras said once, a lot of you have “been around the block” for a lot longer than I have, and are very mature and intelligent men to begin with). Responding to posts and comments on this website requires a great deal of tact because we are dealing with very controversial issues that most people arent even willing to touch upon. There is a very fine line in these controversial issues to making a strong and solid rebuttal (which is an absolutely vital thing to be able to do when responding to posts and comments under the category of femenists and feminism) and “going overboard”. I will have to take even more care to remain on the right side of this line in the future, and I will look at your responses as examples of how to do this.
–Luke Skywalker
December 24, 2006 at 9:53 am
…just to add that most man want to date more women in order to boost their ego. But this is not the way to find real love. There’s no secret that the essence of happiness is love…
But the medias are constantly sabotaging our brains injecting superficiality every day in our society. The medias are always trying to influence us in every way. The aggressiveness of Marketing and advertisements influence us to buy and concentrate our efforts to get the highest income to buy more and more. We are brainwashed to believe that wealth means happiness. And the media changed the image of women as “Sex Trophys” and using it to sell everything they want to. That explains why guys focusing and thinking “How do I get wommen into bed?”, spend money and waste time with attractive women to validate themselves. Woman as well fall in this trap absorving this image and becoming a mere commodity.
People with strong spirit can enjoy every moment and every beautiful thing in life.They don’t need someone dictating what’s cool, right or powerful. And when those people find love they extend their happiness and get a life with minimal burdens pain and sadness.
Keep the good work R_W man and merry Christmas to you all
Ignacio
December 24, 2006 at 1:54 pm
…”Sex Trophies”…
December 24, 2006 at 4:57 pm
“Hear! hear!”, Akhand.
Merry Christmas everyone.
December 24, 2006 at 5:33 pm
Hello Akhand welcome aboard and thanks for your nice comments. You brought up an interesting point about how society wants you to buy this self-destructive idea or that for the sake of the almighty dollar. I’m sure that factor is hard at work with what has happened in the US and in the West as far as dating is concerned like you said.
Please tell your friends about us.. Cheers! GL
December 24, 2006 at 5:36 pm
Luke, Meebo is there on an experimental basis for now because I’m using dial up to do this blog and I’ve had some hangups with meebo with that lack of bandwidth I have. Waiting for some affordable broadband.. unfortunately they still charge by per MB over here.
GL
December 24, 2006 at 5:38 pm
EE you hit it on the head.. Freedom does come to you in the US for a price. And overall everything is so expensive there in comparison with most of the rest of the world. Put some links down to your articles on your blog if you want. Thanks again, GL
December 26, 2006 at 2:46 am
As usual RW man, excellent work. Keep telling these girls the truth!
Hopefully some of them will listen.
December 30, 2006 at 11:54 am
Great Site…I’m adding this site to my favorites list…
My own mother has been married nine times and it wasn’t until she began losing her looks that she made the choice to change her tune about men…
while at work I actively avoid all contact with females due to the sexual harrassment laws and the relative ease it is to both be falsely accused and lose one’s job on a false accusation…
A buddy of mine from Mexico has told me that there are plenty of women there who are looking for a good man…That should I ever get divorced to come for a visit and his wife will be glad to set me up with one of her single girlfriends…I have to admit his invitation continues to look better and better the more I see american females mistreat, abuse, use and then discard the men in their lives…I’m even considering retiring there or someplace like it…
December 31, 2006 at 12:01 am
OMG!!!!!!!!! I love your site!!!!!!!!!
I live in NZ and there are so many women here who fit into this category!
NZ women are so stuck up and have so many un-realistic expectations from men
Its got so bad now that many men have wisely given up trying to find a NZ women and have simply found someone from over sea’s who has more wholesome and realistic ideas!
Many women in their thirties are realizing that there isn’t many guys around but haven’t figured out, it’s because of there own altitudes towards men that have put them in this position!
In NZ there is a “man shortage” (NZ Herald) and as one of the many hardworking honest guys who have been snubbed by many NZ women time and time again I call it justice!
December 31, 2006 at 4:55 am
John, you have to admit there is poetic justice in this situation. Women need to wise up to one simple and inexorable reality. If men can’t find a local woman, or a woman from their country, they’ll turn to women from abroad. It’s outsourcing at it’s finest and at the most basic level.
Taras
December 31, 2006 at 5:00 pm
Hi John Welcome Aboard!
Thanks for telling us what the view is like from New Zealand.. I’ve always wanted to go there even before Lord of the Rings came out.. but unfortunately your Women sound like Orc’s by the way you describe them.. Ugh.. I’m sure there are some good ones as in all places but I guess even a pristine place like NZ is not immune.. Bummer..
Cheers! GL
December 31, 2006 at 7:43 pm
Not when the feminist Orcs are hard at work RW_Man unfortunately. Like Orcs, they worship and are the embodiment of ugliness.
Taras
December 31, 2006 at 10:15 pm
To Quiet Rebel in response to comment 10.
I have read the excerpts from that book and what they show men is the sensual sexual game playing that all dishonest women play with men in order to manipulate them and control them financially and sexually, in a completely dishonest and ruthless way.
This excerpt from Chapter 6 is particular interesting:
What Men can do.
Someone once compared the male brain to a series of interlocking rooms, whose doors open easily and link one interior to the next; while the mind of a woman is like an enormous cavern, where thoughts and feelings flit around and carom off one another in a chaos of haphazard patterns. This is the difference between logic and emotion. Male logic builds cities and dreams up inventions-it gets things done. But a man’s intellect is always a slave to his sex drive. A surge of testosterone can leave even a genius an emotional cripple. This is the tragic flaw which has ruined lives and emptied bank accounts, because men always live at the mercy of female sexual power.
It is absolutely vital that men learn to triumph over the domination of their natural urges. As hard as this may be-and it will be the most difficult test ever put to any man-it is the only way to break the back of female sexual tyranny. Women innately understand how to use men, how to bully them into becoming crawling pawns who will do anything, pay anything for the chance to touch their bodies. A woman’s sole reason for existence, and the source of her power and self-esteem, is between her legs.
Men, the only way to reclaim your manhood and to vanquish female oppression forever is to stop paying for pussy. Now. You don’t need to go to Mars or Venus or look for wives overseas; you don’t need to learn to “communicate”; you don’t need to run naked through the woods banging on a drum. All of this is just pandering to women, and granting them more power over your thinking, because you are still playing the game by their rules. If you truly want women to act like normal human beings, if you want to participate in decent, honest relationships, or if you want to once again enjoy being in the company of females, just stop groveling before them. Your obedience is their power base, and once the power base is destroyed, so will their arrogance and greed.
And as Taras says for all Fathers of Sons out their this should be requried reading/insight in to the Battle between the sexes.
Sincerely, From C.
January 4, 2007 at 9:31 am
Thanks for the comment RW_Man,
Yeah the altitude of many chicks towards men is like a pack of orcs at feeding time!! Ugly Sadistic Brutal and you wannna stay the hell away lol!
January 5, 2007 at 7:53 pm
1. Not long ago, I investigated New Zealand for a man in med school who was considering leaving the US. I discovered it is one of two most messed up, feminist countries in the world. In the US, in 1984, 9.4 of every 1,000 population married; and around half that many divorced. By 2000, it was down to 8.0/1000. Five years later, it had dropped to 7.5 (Bureau of Vital Statistics).
In New Zealand, they report it differently, but when I converted it to /1000 population, it came out to around 5/1000 married and half that many divorced. In NZ, as a general statement, any woman who wants a man at all, has no power to demand marriage. They mostly live together.
I don’t know about Canada’s shack-up ratio, but they also have around 5/1000 marriages.
The US dearies haven’t even yet begun to suffer.
2. I am in Mexico. Mexican women are great when they are in Mexico. If you can find a job, and there are technical jobs in Mexico City and other foreign factories for English speakers due to UNAM problems, come here, marry and stay here.
HOWEVER DO NOT ASSUME ALL MEXICAN WOMEN ARE GREAT. There are the same sorts of personalities here as in all cultures, and you can run into fiends here as well. The courts and government don’t treat them the same. But, there are faithless, vicious women here just as in every country.
3. I remember when my niece from Mexico City was 25, she visited the state of Chiapis on a charitable activity. There was a 16 year old girl who was getting married. She asked my niece if she wsa married, and how old she was. when my niece said she was 25, the girl said, “Pobrecita!” (Poor girl.) Then, realzing how that sounded, she said, “Well, maybe you will still find a husband.”
4. By the way, wonderlander keeps saying the divorce rate for Russian women marryng foreigners is 80%. US figures consistently run around 25%. I would like to know the foundation for her statements. Her figures are on the low side when the foreign man is more than 15 years older than the Russian woman, those couples run almost 100% divorce rate, but for men in the same age bracket, most sources I have seen claim very low divorce rates.
January 7, 2007 at 7:24 am
Hi Anonymous..
thanks for the insightful and detailed comments. Wonderlanders figures don’t jive with what the INS figures are that I’ve read a while back which imply that foreign marriages are highly successful in comparison to domestic ones.
Quite frankly most of the time I have a hard time reading her comments because here communication and thinking is way to culturally metaphorical and obtuse to make any consistent sense to an American Guy like myself. That’s why I write the way I do..
She’s more then welcome to comment and all of you are more then welcome to take what she says with a healthy dose of salt..
In anycase check out this guys link to get an idea what the deal is with conventional marriages between Western or US couples. What I’m advocating here is FAR better then what you are going to face here..
http://www.mattweeks.com/strike.htm
Cheers GL
January 7, 2007 at 10:30 pm
Well, as an apprentice at blogging, and a non-native speaker, often automatically taking my cultural background for common knowledge, I recognize a strong need to improve, and appreciate criticism as well as discussion!
Sometimes it feels an unmanageable task to map our Land of Mystery and Paradox, – which is all the more important, as I see that, without disclosing all the layers and variants, many conclusions (whosever) often arouse serious misinterpretation or disbelief in strangers.
What is most unfortunate, is that masperpieces of research and loads of collective experience are in Russian, and I wish I could spend all my time on translating.
Google search for Russian-foreign divorce rates gave 34,600 referrals in Russian language. In English, it’s 1 030 000 for “Russian American divorce rate” only, yet part of the publications relate to this or that nation’s domestic marriages, and all pages of results within my patience have been filled with information by marriage agencies. It was also one of them that gave the only link to INS stats I’ve found,.. and this link turned out inactive – would appreciate an authentic one!
Now, in a hurry to say “B” to my “A” of current interest, I’ve made a quick compilation from some scholarly research, press referrals to various census bureaus, and forums of Current, Future, or Former, Emigree Wives.
The links might take a special blog :-), so, to not overburden the text, I posted but several links there (the rest I keep in my bookmarks for future exploration and translation, as well as for answering to doubts.)
Hex, it’s over midnight here again. So, sorry for lack of style and formatting.
Have a nice day, Gentlemen. Nightie-night, Natalia. Thanks everyone for attention. I am no feminist, nor their convert. 🙂
http://russianwomenspeak.wordpress.com/2007/01/07/some-reasons-why-international-russian-american-marriages-fail/
January 9, 2007 at 10:47 am
Rubbish:)
Tell this to a woman who did find a right man to be in a relationship with (probably also had kids), put up with c…p he had been her for years and got dumped for a manipulative young thing just at the same age as the one picturered. At least the former has some good memories and did have a great time.
PS Young and beautiful girls start out as anyone else – trustful, loving, willing to find the right person and be with them.
It usually takes one man treating them badly to dispell that trust and willingness to be with the Right Person. Those who have brains as well as looks do v.well for themselves and have no regrets.
It looks like it’s getting pretty bad over there, battle of the sexes at its worst.
January 9, 2007 at 6:52 pm
married2abrit,
So I guess what you are saying is that if you’ve been burned once in your life then By God you should never look for Real Love again..
Sounds like a “Great” Plan..
Let me know how long you intend on making this a part of your core identity and how “happy” you plan on being for the rest of your life.
GL
January 14, 2007 at 7:25 pm
GL
;o) None of the above scenarios (2) actually apply to me, that doesn’t make them less common.
Live and let live. Why criticize someone else’s lifestyle. We all are likely to have various regrets at the end of our life.Why not live it like one wants or is able or sees fit.
You might be diagnosed with cancer tomorrow and that very woman will say to you: “Oh, it’s your fault, you smoked/didn’t eat enough fruit and veg lol
January 16, 2007 at 9:11 am
There was a very timely article that just came out from an ex-feminist that is completely related to this post. Highly recommended.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,2092-2545852,00.html
I give this woman big kudos and credit for telling her story as truthfully as she did but I disagree with her assessment for her future options in life for finding a husband given her age.
It’s a painful wake up call and she very well might be in denial over it..
Read it and understand.. GL
January 16, 2007 at 11:21 am
Nice article. I often see / hear / read girls who have abandoned the idea of letting love into their lives, and blame the world for no more love existing. A vicious circle of disbelief caused by disbelief. They even feel comfortable… but it’s a homeostasis of one drinking coffee not to fall asleep from soporific they’ve taken at the same time. This is exactly what “sex without love” is. Not to feel & let feel as great as Making Love can be!
Esoterically, there is no bond like sex. Any sex (any contact, any gender). A common egregor is born… the term takes long explanation, may I say “joint fate” and “intermixture of fates” as energies are exchanged just like salivae and microflorae. You inherit something from the other, and leave part of yourself in him/her… go weeding it off… it tears and perishes… brrrr. Poor thoughtless women, poor thoughtless men.
Sinc., N.
January 16, 2007 at 12:17 pm
Nice article. Wrote a comment, but it fell through. Placed under this post. You’ll like it. )
http://russianwomenspeak.wordpress.com/2006/12/28/how-accessible-russian-brides-are-the-misconceptions-of-sexually-provoking-prostitute-like-dress-fashion-and-sexy-photos
January 16, 2007 at 1:18 pm
to rw_man
Why use imperative? In a discussion or debate.
Arrogant is a European word (French).
We are not using it enough, apparently;)
January 16, 2007 at 6:33 pm
Married2abrit,
I’m just taking your statements and bringing them to their logical outcome. Hardly an “imperative” at all.. You ought to try it sometime. It just might change your life in a way you would like to see.
GL
January 16, 2007 at 7:52 pm
RW_man said:
“I disagree with her assessment for her future options in life for finding a husband given her age.
It’s a painful wake up call and she very well might be in denial over it.. ”
Boy, you can say that again! How delusional can she be? She was basically a prostitute for years, and she thinks she can dismiss all that as a phase she was going through. On top of that, she thinks she’s 37 going on 23??
January 17, 2007 at 10:19 am
2 GL
http://owl.english.purdue.edu/handouts/grammar/g_vmood.html
Some verbs are in the imperative mood, which expresses commands or requests
Like “Read and understand” in your example.
Commands and requests are hardly appropriate in a discussion or a debate.
January 17, 2007 at 10:46 am
married2abrit, can you please explain to us exactly why they are inappropriate? And while you are at it, can you please show us exactly where rw_man inappropriately used commands or requests?
If anything, it should be considered inappropriate in a discussion or debate to accuse someone of inappropriateness without pointing out exactly where they said something inappropriate. Frankly, I don’t see anywhere on this page where he asked you to “read and understand” anything.
Also as a matter of fact, your command/request that no-one make commands/requests is self-contradictory.
–Luke Skywalker
January 17, 2007 at 2:32 pm
married2abrit: YAWN. Talk about a red herring..
January 17, 2007 at 2:34 pm
Or is it ‘straw man’? Please enlighten me as to which is the correct usage.
January 17, 2007 at 3:23 pm
Married2abrit,
Do you have a compulsive personality disorder?
Your focus on trivialities away from the central issue behind this post is very strange to me.
If you want to prove how great you are with the “Queen’s English” please do it someplace else.
If you want to debate me on any issue that I’ve written about in regards to Russian Women or Feminism then..
“Bring it on”
January 21, 2007 at 1:36 am
k, I am new to this site.
I have to say I LOVE IT!!!!!!.
WoW!!! been reading the blogs all day!!
I have a personal story to tell on feminism. Maybe I just need some ears people!! Just not sure if this is where it should be told? Help!!! also,I am talking to a Woman in Russia..seems sincere but I am new to this, so I am doing my homework…carefully.
Married2abrit,
I’m not one to throw stones, but I will say this….”Why criticize someone elses lifestyle?” Becuase one persons inablity to make sound, rational, and moral choices in life can destroy another persons chance at a wholesome, spiritual life!!!! something you don’t seem to have a grasp on. Human beings, their hearts, and souls should not be used like an amusement park ride due to another persons obvious disregard for themselves, community, or spirituality. There are consequences that can irreversibly change the course of someone’s life. Is this the very mindset at the root of feminism/selfishness in America? Like some type of sick justification for being self-absorbed. example… oh well, sorry about the S.T.D. anyway “live and let live” don’t worry it, they have meds for that….you’ll be fine..
sorry……gross, sick, weak…just weak..
January 21, 2007 at 5:53 am
Hi Systemic,
Welcome aboard brother.. The more brains we can add into the mix the better so please go for it with your personal stories..
Your comments to Married2abrit are right on target..
People just don’t realize how their “live and let live” attitudes ripple out negatively into other people’s lives and also into their own future.. Hense my post on “The Prostitutes Game”..
Anyways.. Please tell your friends and fellow men about us.. Cheers GL
January 22, 2007 at 4:18 am
k, here it goes.
I lived in Albuquerque from 98-2004 I went home for my sisters wedding and me and her best friend hit it off. She moved back to Albuquerque with me right. We knew each other for a a few years before this so. Well some bad things happened. I had music stolen from me by a hollywood label, then we got robbed while we were at home. this freaked her out and deppressed me, so we moved back home to Louisiana. Well now it get’s good. I worked hard, even though I don’t make a whole lot of money, to buy her a house. Something her ex husband screxed her out of. So we get the house barely, and becuase I want her to feel secure, We put it in her name. well, 31 days later Hurricane Katrina took that house. I stuck by her, and rebuilt it from top to bottom by myself. the estimated damages were 88,000 not including the contents which were mine. we only recieved 68,000. so, I managed to rebuild it and only charge her 34,000 and we used the rest to buy new furniture, and a new honda for her. what did I get for Xmas after I had just finished the house. after all the work and all the hardship. She left me for a much older married man at her work. she put me out in the cold in boxes on Dec 2, 2006. the same day I left she had him sleeping in my bed. she told me “I just need some time and space” and before I could even talk to her about it, he is living in my home. I have been devasted. She took me for everything. Except the Dog. she wanted him too, but I couldn’t chance my dog. I left to go back to Albuquerque becuase her new Mr. wonderful came by my sisters house and took the lugs off my truck. So they basically took my truck too. I’ll fix it but still. His way of saying go away. Now at this point I had to leave or I was going to snap and throw the rest of my life away. that’s why I returned to Albuquerque. Just to distance myself. My whole life has been completely screxed up.
This guy makes a 100,000 a year, and she said to me….”This is my chance for happiness, don’t you want that for me?” God, after all we went through. I stood in the Eye of Hurricane Katrina as it passed over slidell becuase we were to poor after buying the house to even afford the gas to evacuate. I waded through shix and pixx just to get her a dry towel when the storm surge ripped through our home causing the septic to back up. I waded through mold and bacterial filth so she would not have to see the inside of a fema trailer. which she never did. our neighbors are still in trailers. what hurt me the most is, the day I left, that night she had him in my bed, watching my new flat screen. This was the first time in my life that I had a home to call home, and as soon as I earned it, it got taken away. See, I got really sick becuase of all this and she just wouldn’t stick by me. it was temporary, but enough to really mess up my life. Now I don’t know what the heck I am doing. There are so many more details to this story it is unbelievable, enough to fill a book.
He doesn’t even come close to making her smile the way I did. I believe she got drunk at work while covering for the main girl and he seduced her. becuase I was sick, well, I was temporarliy on the outs sexually. after that she couldn’t come home and face me. that’s when it hit the fan. that’s when i figured out what was going on. I can’t really talk much more right now. it is just too daxx upsetting.
She hurt so many people. my entire family loved her.
thanks for the ear.. and the warm welcome.
January 24, 2007 at 1:40 am
What I personaly think is really tragic about this story is….
She went digging for gold, when she already had a diamond that just needed polishing.
sys
January 24, 2007 at 1:58 am
thought I’d share the poem i wrote for her when all this happened.
Dear Beautiful,
I have written this poem for you not for me.
For my love for you is pure, and shall set you free.
I know the night you lied about working late,
Was the same night you made the desperate mistake,
Of letting someone else take what he had no right to take.
I know you doubted whether or not I even cared,
But I can assure I knew from the smell of your hair,
It did take a bit for the truth to click,
Before I realized that you too were sick,
But, It is me not you that should shoulder the blame,
I neglected your heart and for that I’m ashamed.
You had tried to tell me you were drifting away,
But I was too self-absorbed to hear you say,
That with out my affection you would not stay.
You tried and tried but to no avail,
My ears were working, but my hearing had failed.
This was not because I did not care,
But rather an illness known as despair,
Hurricane Katrina did her work well,
And like so many others, I fell under her spell.
All I can do is pray for our sake,
No more from our lives will she continue to take.
I felt it was important for you to know,
That with true love comes forgiveness,
And only through that can we grow,
Together we’ve changed our lives for the best,
And now it is time for the ultimate test,
Of whether or not our tree of love will bloom,
Or will stubborn denial send our tree to its doom.
I know in my heart that we were meant to be,
That’s why I have written this poem for you not me,
Because it is My love for you that has set you free.
I love you Jennifer. I forgive you. I will always pray for your happiness, and as promised I would not leave without saying goodbye.
And with that said,
Zeus and I say Goodbye.
January 24, 2007 at 2:17 am
For what it’s worth Systemic, I can relate to how deeply you were betrayed. Although I didn’t get cheated out of my house, I left my wife when I learned what she was up to behind my back. You’re understandly extremly angry, in your place I likely would have probably turned into murderous Cossack at the sight of him. But it’s not worth going to jail, if you really want revenge, put your life back together and if you find a lovely Russian woman who’ll appreciate a man like you, marry her and happiliy raise a family. But right now, I don’t think it’s a good idea to try to start a relationship with another woman right now. That anger you have in your heart will surface in ways that can wreck a relationship before it even starts. It took me a quite some time to stop wanting to literally throttle my ex and her previous husband. I had to let go of a lot of anger and hostility, and even now I do not trust women easily, nor will I ever again. You’ll have to do the same. Be careful, and don’t set yourself up and a young lady too for more heartache. As for your ex, if you have her social security number, take it to a private investigator and see what he finds. That can be leverage you’ll need later. Cut all ties with this woman however otherwise, no contact, no phone calls and don’t let her know where you are. That is to protect you since that guy could have just as easily cut the brake lines on your truck in an attempt to kill you. It does happen more often than people think, there are a lot of Black Widows in the U.S. If something happens involving this woman, you don’t want to be anywhere near her. You’ll be an obvious suspect. Good luck to you, and please don’t let this bitch ruin ANY chance at you being happy again.
Taras
January 24, 2007 at 2:19 am
That should read, ever trust women implicitly…….
Taras
January 24, 2007 at 4:18 am
Thanks Taras,
But that is the exact quality that I will not let her take from me.(meaning trust)Why should another woman not benifit from the good honest, sincere, trusting, and yes, “vulnerable” heart that I possess as a man. It is this quality that has brought us here. It is this quality that most American women will not understand until they are done playing the “Prostitute’s Game” and their arse is “old, gray, and alone” wishing they had it. It is this quality that, as I understand it, most Russian women are smart enough to look for and appreciate.
As far as the other guy goes, sincerely, he is the one that is lucky. seriously. I caught him outside the house, or my dog let me know rather. I am not big on guns, but as I am sure you saw in the news coverage of Katrina, they became necessary. Becuase I helped the army and police during this crisis, they made sure I could protect my home adequately(a few tokens I still possess thanks to a really nice U.S. Marshall). I exercised extreme self-less-ness when I caught him outside the house @ 1:30 in the morning. I just did not know what he was doing until the wheel flew off on the interstate. He looked up and saw me standing on the porch quitely watching him, and he took off(true coward). anyway, it doesn’t matter. You are right, that is why I distanced myself. For his safety, and my self preservation. I still have a good shot at a good life(as I am only 35) and God is in my heart. I am not going to let some spoiled little GIRL take that away from me. I am not an angry man though, just a man with a good heart that has been done extreme wrong. As such, I felt that this would make a great story on Feminism.
Besides, A REAL woman would appreciate a man with the qualities that I possess. You see, I was never abusive in anyway, and I was always there for her every need. I just got side tracked with “The worst natural disaster this nation has ever seen” and instead of her sticking by me the way I stuck by her, she left me for the first man with “more money in his wallet” for a cheap good time. Materialistic Feminist American Hoe. lol
I will be fine. I am an extremely talented man, and you know what they say…..
“Behind every good man is a good………
WOMAN.” WO-MAN lol
It just really stinks that after working so hard, I have to start all over. But, as my mother raised me with everyday…..
“That which does not kill us, makes us stronger, and God never sleeps”
Just so you can better understand me as a man, even after she dumped me for Xmas I still gave her her Xmas present. Diamond earings. Even after knowing she cheated on me. I would never hurt anyone. why?
because I understand something so simple it’s beautiful and I live by it as hard as it may be sometimes. I am not here to preach religion so please don’t miss understand me, but this is what I am trying my damnest to live by everyday.
LIVE, today might be your last with the one you love,
LOVE, everything else is forbidden
FORGIVE, everyone and everything
FEAR, nothing
TRUST, in me for I am the Lord.
My greatest source of sorrow is for her. For in the end she only hurt herself. She threw away the greatest blessing God ever gave her. A man that truly loved her. In actuality, she did me a favor. I am just glad I didn’t have kids with the woman.
I’ll build another house, and I’ll build it better……For a better, a real WOMAN.
January 24, 2007 at 10:58 am
Systemic, you The Man.
If you need a word of support, here is my hand.
If you need a word of humor, here’s a line from an Estonian song: “If the bride walks away to another, no one knows who is lucky indeed.”
If you need a word of the Scar Clan, here it is:
Yes, Better Now…
The most fierce revenge you can take is to turn away and build your own happiness.
The most ruthless penalty God has is letting her enjoy her choice.
If you need a word of encouragement, here is an abstract from my creative writings.
http://russianwomenspeak.wordpress.com/2007/01/24/abstract-of-my-different-writing-from-russian-western-eastern-men-vs-women-novel/
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia.
January 25, 2007 at 6:15 am
Thanks Natalia,
Revenge is not my goal. I could have already done that leagally. I had power of attorney over the house. I left willingly,not with out saying my peace, but willingly. I just loved her, and never expected her to hurt me so deeply. I never expected things to turn out like they did. I know she was hurt too. We all make mistakes in life and, she hurts too. She just handled this differently than I expected. Katrina took a serious toll on everyone involved, and it destroyed many families. Most of us don’t even realize how seriously, phsycologicaly speaking, this storm effected us. It is just now as I am getting better that I realize how sick I was from bacteria, viral, all the way to depression.
sys
January 25, 2007 at 8:15 am
Yes, you’ve made it as clear as enlightening )
…and storms are often the only way to reconstruction.
A word of admiration, if I forgot.))
January 27, 2007 at 1:53 am
Well thanks for the ear all, and now for the real reason I stumbled here..!
I am talking to this Russian girl via email.
She contacted me through singlesnet.com
Now so far my experience has been that 75% of anyone contacting me is a scam. I have learned to observe who is actually viewing my profile and who is not which has turned out to be a great indicator of who is for real or not. with that said, we have conversed with about 8 emails now. She almost always sends me pics, and I can’t find any trace of her reported for mischief anywhere. I have recently asked her for her mailing address, so we will see. She seems sincere but how do I know. Is there any sure
fire (tell tale) sign, or question to ask?
Sys
January 27, 2007 at 1:56 am
one more thing, She has stated that she does not care about money. She is just looking for a good, honest man to spend the rest of her life with. She is 28 and is from the Kansk area. anyway, that’s the real reason I am here. I just don’t want to get messed over again. I have been through enough. any insight would be apreciated.
sys
January 27, 2007 at 2:40 pm
Be careful Systemic, I’ve been fooled too you know. It goes back to the old adage, “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.” I really feel you need to regroup from what happened before trying again, because you’re in a vulnerable position. It’s never a good idea to trust a woman, or for that matter, anyone else implictly unless that person demonstrated they are worthy of that degree of trust. That is after all what all relationships depend upon, and to qoute the U.S. Marines, trust is earned, never given. The only way to really know what this woman is about, is spending time with her and her family. Pay attention to how her parents treat each other and what sort of relationship they have with her. In the Middle East, children are regarded as the father or mother of men and women. In this way, you’ll see what sort she really is and what you can expect from her if the two of you decide to go ahead. Even then, people sometimes change in really negative ways. It would be wise if your family could meet her, they could be of great help in avoiding a repeat of your previous disastrous experience.
Taras
January 27, 2007 at 3:06 pm
Systemic,
You should also notice that when you rearrange the letters in “Kansk”, you get “Skank”.
January 27, 2007 at 6:01 pm
Do you have a compulsive personality disorder?
Your focus on trivialities away from the central issue behind this post is very strange to me.
If you want to prove how great you are with the “Queen’s English” please do it someplace else.
If you want to debate me on any issue that I’ve written about in regards to Russian Women or Feminism then..
To rw_man (or GL)
Do you always insult people whose views are different to yours? Or those who think on a different level? I do not live in your medical system when everyone is labeled and there’s a drug for everyone, with a fat profit for pharmaceutical companies,please bear that in mind.
My English can hardly be defined as Qween’s, in fact, it is not even my first or native language.
All I did was trying to explain what I meant by “Imperative” .
No, I do not wish to debate you on “Russian women” or “Feminism” in your interpretation, because I think it preposterous to even discuss these “issues”. Or pathetic – to use them to promote your web-site.
In fact, some might think your assumptions and generalizations on “Russian women” quite untrue and nationalistic.
The fact that you met a few of them and spent a few months in their environment doesn’t make you a connoiseur. Far from it. This is obvious to anyone with basic intelligence or at least some common sense.
Please forgive me for saying what I think and wasting the valuable space in this thread lol
January 27, 2007 at 7:19 pm
Married2abrit..
He has not spent a few MONTHS in Russia.
Rather, he has spent a few YEARS.
He has not met just a FEW Russian women.
Rather, he has met MANY.
There are many things on his site which make this crystal clear. Please get your facts straight before making claims.
Thank You,
Luke Skywalker
January 28, 2007 at 3:01 pm
Systemic, I started some observations here
http://russianwomenspeak.wordpress.com/2007/01/12/new-russian-bride-online-scam-art-technology-alert-or-just-life-sophistocated-gentle-long-term-indefinite-result/,
also in Part 2 (“Too-good-to-be-true” black lists),
but generalizations (inevitable when you write for general interest) are a treacherous ground, things may turn different in any individual case. Some people whom I’ve been helping to review their correspondence would confirm. )
Please feel at home to address me for consultation, and I believe GL is here to lend a hand if you choose his.
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
January 28, 2007 at 3:41 pm
Married2aBrit..
I love your little implication..
i.e. me “exploiting” Feminism to promote my site..
Wow that’s great spin lady 🙂
Feminism has dropped it’s own stink bomb within the company of men and now it’s time to let them know what the alternatives are that are less “smelly”.
Why don’t you try to make my site “obsolete” by “reforming” all the “misguided” Feminist who are out there and show them the light so that Men like us won’t even bother looking someplace else?
And the other question is this.. Why are you hanging out here? Are you ready for a real debate or are you just trying to vent your hot air?
If it’s for the hot air I’m sure you will find many other places on the net that will be much more receptive to you instead of here. But hey if you still want the obvious abuse by hanging out here.. then that’s your call 🙂
Oh and by the way.. where in this site does it say that I’ve only been her for a “few months” and have met with only a “few russian ladies”?
Is this more spin on your part? Or just a flat out lie? GL
January 28, 2007 at 3:44 pm
Systemic..
I’m all for you getting some hope in your life and corresponding with some ladies so that you can gain some valuable perspective.
But given what you’ve told me I’d advise you to be realistic in terms of how long your rebuilding process is going to take so that you can realistically settle down with a lady who you will be completely responsible for a significant period.
Or in other words.. make sure you can take care of yourself before you extend that generosity to someone else.
Good Luck Man.. GL
January 28, 2007 at 7:02 pm
No doubt rw_man,
I agree, I am just poking my head out to see the options for this is not my first rodeo with the American woman. more like the third burn. My first wife did almost the same thing.
thought the grass was greener. where is she now? two kids from two different men, and not with either one of them. I am taking all the time I need, and I am definately taking care of me. Working two jobs to get back on track. helping a lot. One of them is great, I climb poles all day for the cable company. I get to look out over the city every day, all day. really helping to clear my head and regain the clarity that I had lost. I am in better shape than most people in America, and I am grateful for it.
Drug free, debt free, disease free, can’t ask for much more considering the last two years of my life ya know? My primary focus right now is to stay on top of my life. I WILL finish what I started. I WILL release the music that was stolen from me. I will reassemble the pieces of me that have been scattered to the wind, and as I do I will remember that God has a plan for everyone of us. I believe that… “Everything happens for a reason.” And may I be so lucky to identify my place in this “Sea of Madness”
Thanks Natalia for the consultation offer.
I think I will need it. This girl has asked me for my number as she wants to call me this week. I plan on taking a lot of time with this. I am very sceptical. As GL pointed out… it is going to take time for me to be whole again no matter how I slice or dice it. “Time heals all wounds”.
Thanks to all for caring enough to listen to stories of my wounded heart.
sys
January 29, 2007 at 5:07 am
I guess there is really justice in the universe after all. I got wind from several collegue that the woman I mentioned earlier (Anna B), well her program was scrubed and instead of staying in the US for one full year she was send back to Russia after 1 semester (4~5 month). The real kicker was that on our first date she mentioned how she thought her younger sister has been corrupt by MTV and have lost the traditional family value. Well her younger sister (by 5 years) is getting married. Maybe it’s her own values that needs to be re-examined. Had she not try to “have her cake and eat it too” and give the relationship a real shot, I probably would of have found a way for her to stay at least the full year. Know she is back in Russia where at her age she is considered (her words) an old maid. Well I guess the old saying “WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND” is really true.
January 29, 2007 at 8:12 am
Oh, a failure foreign record is a REAL punishment back home. )
Derision guaranteed. Especially from men.
A return to “rags from riches” is a mere trifle compared to it!
…As if she didn’t know “convenience marriages” are kicked off.
January 30, 2007 at 4:35 pm
This is a great blog…very insightful. I need some advice from someone who understands Russian women. I paid a visit to a Russian escort recently. This was for all intents and purposes strictly for fun, but I’ve realized something: I’ve arrived at this unforeseen crossroads that I left with more than I expected. I’ve found myself enthralled with compassion and a desire to care for the well-being of this woman. And it makes sense to me. I’m still working on how the hell I’ve arrived at such a place as this. I’m no dummy, though. I have a bachelor’s degree in Physics, a master’s, and I am working on my second master’s while I’m in medical school (though I’m taking a sabbatical right now). I am fully aware of the differences between crushes, lust, love, and genuine caring and dedication. I accept her for who she is. I want to know what makes her happy, makes her sad, what kind of issues does she have/face, what can I do to help. I want to be the one good constant and dependable thing in her life.
Now a little about her. She admitted that she left Russia only a few years ago before moving to North America (hence living almost all of her life in Russia), saying that Russia was very depressing. I got the impression that she had a rough time there, but I didn’t pursue this avenue (like asking about her parents or if/when she ever visits home). And what strikes me as odd in this situation is your comment about how Russian women are into having a family and a successful and loving marriage, (which is how I believe we naturally develop and live), and how they never say “I want to focus on my career and forgo my opportunities at having a family.”
This latter point is exactly what she is all about, or what she claims is her motivation for doing this (not only this, but she is also a porn star who is into many varied…..situations). She says this is what she likes doing and that it helps finances her career and future.
What I want to ask is this: Because you know Russian women (and she tells me that she is Russian “to the bone”), what are your impressions and thoughts about someone who has chosen this type of life? Moving from Russia over to N. America and not working towards a family, but rather choosing to perform in front of the camera and be an escort. I am planning on making another appointment with her soon, and I want to tell her how I feel. How would someone in her position possibly react to this? Please let me know, and thank you for taking the time to read this.
January 30, 2007 at 8:02 pm
Hi daringdrive,
Thanks for joining us..
I obviously don’t know this woman but your story is interesting nonetheless..
You may be dealing with more of a “woman who is a prostitute and porn actress”..
As opposed to a “woman who is a russian women”…
I see this potentially going into a couple different directions..
One..
She’s totally jaded by the lifestyle she lives and decides to over play her hand with the “easy money” and falls into the classic trap of not waking up till it’s too late..
Two..
She wants to continue this lifestyle and look for someone to be her BF or to have an emotional connection with in which case you will have to deal with your own level of acceptance over her gig.
Three..
She is looking for a way out and for someone to both love and support her.. and wants to get into the serious wife and mother routine that she was supposed to do from the very begining because of her traditional Russian values..
Either way looks like you are going to find out since you’ve already decided to start walking down this path..
Now saying that..
I hope it’s option 3 for your sake and hers.. I believe she has every right to find happiness and love like everyone else. I just hope that you both find what you are TRULY looking for.
My final recommendation is to tell her about this site.. and your involvement with it.. I’d even go so far as to print out your comment and my response to it and hand it to her for her to absorb. Maybe it will help her to understand what TRULY is most important in her life.
In anycase.. good luck..
And please tell your friends about us..
GL
January 30, 2007 at 8:02 pm
Hi daringdrive,
Thanks for joining us..
I obviously don’t know this woman but your story is interesting nonetheless..
You may be dealing with more of a “woman who is a prostitute and porn actress”..
As opposed to a “woman who is a russian women”…
I see this potentially going into a couple different directions..
One..
She’s totally jaded by the lifestyle she lives and decides to over play her hand with the “easy money” and falls into the classic trap of not waking up till it’s too late..
Two..
She wants to continue this lifestyle and look for someone to be her BF or to have an emotional connection with in which case you will have to deal with your own level of acceptance over her gig.
Three..
She is looking for a way out and for someone to both love and support her.. and wants to get into the serious wife and mother routine that she was supposed to do from the very beginning because of her traditional Russian values..
Either way looks like you are going to find out since you’ve already decided to start walking down this path..
Now saying that..
I hope it’s option 3 for your sake and hers.. I believe she has every right to find happiness and love like everyone else. I just hope that you both find what you are TRULY looking for.
My final recommendation is to tell her about this site.. and your involvement with it.. I’d even go so far as to print out your comment and my response to it and hand it to her for her to absorb. Maybe it will help her to understand what TRULY is most important in her life.
In anycase.. good luck..
And please tell your friends about us..
GL
January 30, 2007 at 9:13 pm
Thank you for the insight. And I agree wholeheartedly with your different options of how this may happen. In fact, you’ve put what I hope and feel is likely to happen into words. All of these options seem to have a positive potential outcome, however are there any negative possibilities that are probable to happen? I always try to examine and be prepared for the entire sphere of possibilities, that way when the results come in I will act accordingly, ensuring the most successful action and outcome on my part.
I appreciate your advice as well. However, I’m curious as to how she may react seeing that I’ve sought advice about this. Might this put her off and become distant and not want to see me again….even as a client? Or would she in fact be flattered that I want to make every step as right as the situation will allow? Again, thank you for the insight, and I will pass on to my friends about this site.
January 30, 2007 at 9:22 pm
daringdrive,
I want to be very realistic with you..
How many guys has she been with that have probably told her the same about their feelings. I’m willing to bet quite a lot given the lack of quality women over there and the need for affection and attention that these Men have.
Given that.. she’s in a possible position to hear “i love you” many times over and it would be more challenging for her to evaluate the static noise from the clear signals.
If you are going to do this.. then you will need to have a very clear signal along with the signal strength to get through.. this may be a quixotic endeavor on one level but hey what ever effort you put into this is up to you..
Therefore I highly doubt if you show her this thread that it would turn her off. It only shows that there’s thought and real intent going into it.
Keep in mind that she may reject you flat out if you show any kind of feeling with or without this thread.. so what do you have to lose?
Like i said whatever happens is going to be a learning experience for you..
Good luck.. GL
January 30, 2007 at 9:45 pm
GL,
I understand the chivalrous side of this, which is not my intent. I know my worth and my value of the rarity of my character. You hit on the crux of this “crossroads” that I’ve mentioned earlier, and that is to send a clear signal.
I don’t suspect that she would reject me because I am not going to show all of my cards. I only want to reveal the right ones that would be intriguing enough to where I can continue to visit her and she would welcome me to do so. I believe she is worth the wait (I’m 27, and so is she). I am a patient man. But regarding sending a clear and strong signal to dispense the surrounding “fog” is what I will need to figure out. Before I left this previous (and first) time, I told her that if she were to ever need anything, don’t hesitate to call me. I have no idea what kind of support structure or friends she has, but as is the case with me, I never hand out my unconditional friendship and dedication. And the fact that I am willing and ready to do this with her (from a motivation deep inside my own self) gives me all the more reason to get it right the first time. So, what would send the strongest message to her….what would be able to reach inside her mind and heart to let that small voice confirm what she is hearing could be what she may need? Is it enough of a start to simply state that I want to be dedicated to her well-being and happiness, and to be supportive? If you please, what would you recommend as being the simplest and strongest statement of intent?
January 31, 2007 at 12:51 am
daringdrive,
A couple of things really concern me in what you have said. “I’ve found myself enthralled with compassion and a desire to care for the well-being of this woman.” That’s completely natural, BUT – it’s also the impulse that scammers absolutely depend on. I’m not saying she’s a scammer, I’m saying that if you don’t get control over that impulse, it will get you into trouble, if not here and now, then somewhere and sometime. As strong as the feeling is, it’s just a feeling. And contrary to popular belief, feelings aren’t always our best guide. I know that detachment and objectivity is the last thing you want right now, but it’s the only thing that will protect you.
Then you say “Might this put her off and become distant and not want to see me again….even as a client?” That’s another big red flag to my mind. Even the prospect of her not wanting to do business with you makes you afraid to act in your own interest. You have given away all your power. You are worried only about what she will think, worried about losing something you don’t even have. And you aren’t looking out for yourself anymore. That’s extremely dangerous. If a girl is a scammer, she will spot this in you immediately and use it without mercy. And if she is a genuine woman with a heart of gold, guess what? She doesn’t want a man like that. It’s a lose-lose situation.
I’m sorry, dd, but I don’t think you are in anywhere near the right state of mind right now to use your best judgment, and I’m afraid you are going to get hurt one way or the other. I speak from experience. This is something that every man has to deal with in himself, in a relationship with any woman, anywhere.
Just my opinion.
January 31, 2007 at 1:09 am
Daringdrive, remember the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. You mean well, but this woman is definitely not the one for you. It has nothing to do with her origins, but prostitutes are not know for trustworthiness for very good reasons. Spare yourself a lot of heartache and find someone else, who’s not a porn star or a prostitute. There are many other women in Russia and elsewhere that won’t turn your good intentions into a one way ticket to Hell.
Taras
January 31, 2007 at 5:32 am
Craig,
Thanks for the input, but I believe you have my intentions mistaken. I am looking out for myself in this. When I talked about her “not wanting to see me again…even as a client,” I am not referring to the hapless love fool tomfoolery that teens and/or those who are emotionally immature or who are simply careless experience. Rather, I choose to tread lightly, and go with the flow. I never go out of bounds with what I am comfortable with, and perhaps I jumped the gun a little bit with that comment, because those are feelings that I have not developed for her (but are a slight possibility and I try to prepare for the various possible outcomes). Trust me, I know when to back off and be objective, which is precisely what I am doing now. Again, thank you for that suggestion.
My comment has not shown what I am truly feeling, so let me state it: I am proceeding very cautiously with this and with patience. I realize from my own experiences that feelings are not always the right thing to trust, so I don’t. I wait. Think it through, and go with my gut instinct. I realize that whatever I might say could be met with a reaction by her that is not genuine and is an effort to keep the Benjamin’s coming.
Simply put, I don’t go forward with anything where I have a clear and unmistakable nagging doubt. I let my conscious be my guide. P.S., I’m curious, what do you believe would be further actions I can take that would be in my best interest?
Taras,
It’s possible that she is a “diamond in the rough”, or that she will forever be “in the rough.” Thanks for your comments, and I am being very careful…why else would I seek out advice?
January 31, 2007 at 6:05 am
Craig,
Thanks for the insight. I’m not going to act on feelings, because I’ve learned the hard way what that can do. I am patient. I am simply exploring the different possibilities of outcomes from different possible actions taken by me. I am not dead-set on doing anything right now other than what I am doing now….seeking out advice. Though, even with this, I am careful to blindly take anything without consideration. This is also what I remind myself of when I think upon this situation; She could be genuine in her responses, but then again, it could be a very clever cover to simply keep the Benjamin’s rolling in.
I appreciate your concern for my state of mind, but if you knew me, you’d know that I think a lot(sometimes way to much), to the point that the eventual outcome is something I had already expected and planned for. As far as my comment on “pushing her away”, I take that back. That didn’t represent what I am concerned with, because that is something that takes the concern for my own well-being out of the equation and replaces it with nothing but pain and hurt. If acting in my own best interest is going to cause more pain and hurt than success, then I’m running from the situation like hell. However, if there is a payoff someday, then I can bear the load of the rough road that leads there. But how can you really know what the future holds? For me, it’s been that small voice that guides.
I admit that I let a little of that non-objectivity seep into my responses, making it as though I am going to be acting out the wreckless abandon of pure and fleeting misguided emotion. It may seem a little twisted on the surface, but I have seen much worse work out better. I don’t anticipate anything other that the right outcome for this, whatever that may be. In the meantime, I tread lightly with caution.
Taras,
I understand what you are saying. And you are right, from a certain point of view. But I don’t like to generalize any group of people. Just as in human anatomy, there are functional anomalies. She may forever be “in the rough” rather than a “diamond in the rough.” Rest assured, she can turn my good intentions into that ticket only if I allow it. I know better than to touch a hot stove.
January 31, 2007 at 6:35 am
Daringdrive, I have to agree with Taras for several reason. As Taras pointed out, this woman have engaged in the shady business of selling her body out for money. With that and in addition of being in the US for several years, it is prudent to consider the possiblity that she might have adopted and embrased the extreme end of many Western Women’s way of using their vigina to get what they wanted. This is the way I would look at it. Yet again I have been burned enough to not trust the most optimistic senerio.
If you do proceed, I strongly advice you to proceed as you would exploring a dark alley. Keep an eye out for red flags. You can let love inspire you, but do not net love blind you.
January 31, 2007 at 6:37 am
I have to agree with Craig and Taras.
In this situation you are multiplying your risk of failure many times over.
She may really be a great person, but in the end, you cannot unravel the past, all that she has experienced, and all the psychological effects both now and in the future that she has (and will have).
You have to be realistic. And there are so many good options out there for you. Move on.
January 31, 2007 at 7:51 am
Thanks for the comments. They’re making the right action to take become very clear.
January 31, 2007 at 8:40 am
Sorry for the double-post. The first one didn’t seem to go through, so I re-wrote it.
January 31, 2007 at 8:41 am
By the way, she’s not in the US, she’s up in Canada. Been there for the past 5 years.
January 31, 2007 at 9:27 am
A fleeting touch from across the sea…
On the one hand, Russian literature, and later cinema have always portrayed prostitutes as extremely feminine creatures in the most conscientious and caring sense of femininity, just forced to sell it by the ruthless social evils. There’s a widespread saying that “prostitutes eventally make best wives”. And guess what? Many of them regard this path as a way to draw a lucky ticket of Great Love with a Great Man. (Forgetting to ponder, what motivates men to resort to prostitutes, or led by the “so very Russian” motivation to cure someone’s troubles to deserve one’s own happiness.)
On the other hand, it takes a, well, specific type of personality to embark on, and follow this “career”! I won’t fling “pathology” or “disorder” labels if at least she chose her partners by herself, – knowing enough about women who truly love their lovers and can’t stay with any single one of them, nor, respectively, do they attempt to hold them, and the intoxicating effect these women produce with all their, however weirdly, balanced genuinity. Bad news is that they feel too comfortable in this state, to change.
On the third hand ))) (how much more)) people can change significantly throughout their lives,.. yet only by themselves. You can’t affect it otherwise than being yourself, claiming nothing, and being ready to walk away if it doesn’t work. It’s for some reason that you’ve been sent this challenge, and it’s up to you to decide what lesson it is to take from and whether you have finished this course.
I could say, “There’s plenty of fish, find yourself a ready marriage material.” – But why not venture a harder path just if you feel you really should.
I could say, “Take care to not get scammed”; imagine her remember the Russian saying “Love was invented by Russians so that to not pay”; and confront it with our existing (existential?) male Problem-Solving vs. female No-Problem-Making ideals.
I could say, “Go on into her ownest feelings, grievances, wants and fears, without imposing benefactions”, and warn about the equal chances of fearful rejection and grateful recognition of this exploration.
I could say, “Plan to have a dress rehearsal of exclusive commitment, to see if she converts into a new lifestyle”, but there’s nothing more lasting and fragile than temporary tries.
The only sure thing you can rely on, if at all, is whether she is striving (!) to develop some other (definite!) occupation (not counting that of a Man’s Couple: ’cause solving one’s personal fulfilment throes for the account of relationships with another person is trying to quench thirst with food, or dig with lace, well, any oranges-to-apples analogy). Otherwise, my forecast is Top Risk of Very Ailing Co-Dependency.
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia.
Welcome for any help.
January 31, 2007 at 9:35 am
One more important thing… The children issue is seldom taken into account… or goes without saying?
1) Can this unrest bring up balanced and self-motivated people?
2) Have you heard of telegony? Biologically contended, it has psychological / spiritual explanations.
January 31, 2007 at 9:41 am
[Hex, some comments would fall through the site. Sorry for duplicates.]
One more important thing – the Children’s issue, which is often omitted… or goes without saying?
1) Would that personal unrest bring up balanced and self-motivated people?
2) Have you heard of telegony? Biologically contended, it has psychological / spiritual explanations.
January 31, 2007 at 9:46 am
Wonderlander,
Thank you for the reply. Could you explain, please, what this statement means? “Go on into her ownest feelings, grievances, wants and fears, without imposing benefactions”, and warn about the equal chances of fearful rejection and grateful recognition of this exploration.
Does that mean I ask her about her fears, wants, and so on? And “Warn about the equal chances of fearful rejection”..is that something you’re telling to me or something that I should be telling her?
And you forcast….kinda gives me chills, especially the word “Ailing” Co-Dependancy. That sounds bad….is it?
Finally, I thank you for understanding this as a challenge that was “sent.” You’ve got it 100% right. I feel that this has been building up for quite some time and now it’s here. I can’t explain it further than that.
January 31, 2007 at 9:51 am
Wonderlander,
Is telegony regarding the Greek story of Odysseus? If so, I’m not familiar with it.
I’m a little unclear with what exactly you’re referring to with “Would that personal unrest bring up balanced and self-motivated people?”
Could you please explain?
January 31, 2007 at 10:52 am
Natalia raises some very good points.
I would only say that you could also risk “over-analyzing” the whole situation, which does not bring you a solution.
Think back to before you met her. If you had to make a concise list of “ideal attributes” you wanted in a woman, what would be on the list?
I think I know what would not be on the list.
January 31, 2007 at 3:11 pm
Oops, sorry for my English ))) (And for a double comment, if again)
* “Go on into her ownest feelings, grievances, wants and fears, without imposing benefactions”, and warn about the equal chances of fearful rejection and grateful recognition of this exploration. – It’s wonderlander warning daringdrive. )
You know, our women are essentially most appreciative of being… learned, and taken into account. When you listen to her with interest and compassion, keep up the conversation (interactive, emotionally aware, thinking “why” with tolerant understanding, and disclosing your own inner self to her). When you remember what she has been telling you all this time, and act in accord.
Yes, questions are part of this process, but over-intruding with direct or sudden / general (non-evolving-from-the-context-of-the-talk) questions in a manner that resembles “interviews”, “psychoanalyzing” and “interrogations” (even those “how are you today” as a “hello” form, and “whatcha doing now” all the way by the phone) is likely to be resisted as pressure. Also a grain of caution is given to unreserved self-disclosure (those “gender behavior standards” and stringent Soviet upbringing). Especially when you haven’t become familiar enough, and especially beyond the “moment” for hearty talk (peruse those moments as per Para.2!) The main point is that we are more spontaneous, more distant, and more deep than it’s prescribed by the American culture. (Another of the draft posts in some of my handbags…)
And one more thing to distinguish: when one is not “into” a man, she is especially irritable by his reduction of the Distance in personal matters.
Phew! ) Have the guidelines and red flags become more visible?
I highly regard the spirits you speak. You don’t think you’re sacrificing something, and if you expect some detriment to your time or feelings, you better quit. No worries for you, man.))
* “Co-dependency” is a “swearword” in psychology )) Meaning, how disharmonies attract and resonate each other.
If one’s mind is not at peace with him/herself, if one hasn’t realized his/her personal “place under the sun”, it’s hard to expect a constructive match built.
Still less imaginable is raising balanced and positively driven kids (as it is by example that they learn). And kids don’t ask permission to enter the world, whatever contraception…
(Or maybe you’ve grown as strong as to be sent to save her soul? Flaaaaaattering!)
To European-rooted cultures, “dissipation as a path towards enlightenment” is not standard. 😉 Protestantism may traditionally seek fulfilment in Business, Orthodoxy – in Service (no strict borders here, though). Interesting, is there any of these motivations in the background of our porn star’s “dharma”.))) [Humor inside]
* “Telegony” is a breeding phenomenon, when (by actual “supraphysical” interaction or by coincidence) some characteristics of a previous male believably emerge in a female’s progeny from a different male, especially the first one. Is widely practiced in horse breeding, and is somewhat similar to Greek tradition of old men sleeping with boys, for exchanging “mature virility” for “youthful energy”. One more argument not to deal with women complaining on having mixed with “jerks”. )
(Kicking my impertinent bottom off the preaching pulpit, N.)
January 31, 2007 at 3:15 pm
Oops, sorry for my English ))) (And for a double comment, if again)
* “Go on into her ownest feelings, grievances, wants and fears, without imposing benefactions”, and warn about the equal chances of fearful rejection and grateful recognition of this exploration. – It’s wonderlander warning daringdrive. )
You know, our women are essentially most appreciative of being… learned, and taken into account. When you listen to her with interest and compassion, keep up the conversation (interactive, emotionally aware, thinking “why” with tolerant understanding, and disclosing your own inner self to her). When you remember what she has been telling you all this time, and act in accord.
Yes, questions are part of this process, but over-intruding with direct or sudden / general (non-evolving-from-the-context-of-the-talk) questions in a manner that resembles “interviews”, “psychoanalyzing” and “interrogations” (even those “how are you today” as a “hello” form, and “whatcha doing now” all the way by the phone) is likely to be resisted as pressure. Also a grain of caution is given to unreserved self-disclosure (those “gender behavior standards” and stringent Soviet upbringing). Especially when you haven’t become familiar enough, and especially beyond the “moment” for hearty talk (peruse those moments as per Para.2!) The main point is that we are more spontaneous, more distant, and more deep than it’s prescribed by the American culture. (Another of the draft posts in some of my handbags…)
And one more thing to distinguish: when one is not “into” a man, she is especially irritable by his reduction of the Distance in personal matters.
Phew! ) Have the guidelines and red flags become more visible?
I highly regard the spirits you speak. You don’t think you’re sacrificing something, and if you expect some detriment to your time or feelings, you better quit. No worries for you, man.))
* “Co-dependency” is a “swearword” in psychology )) Meaning, how disharmonies attract and resonate each other.
If one’s mind is not at peace with him/herself, if one hasn’t realized his/her personal “place under the sun”, it’s hard to expect a constructive match built.
Still less imaginable is raising balanced and positively driven kids (as it is by example that they learn). And kids don’t ask permission to enter the world, whatever contraception…
(Or maybe you’ve grown as strong as to be sent to save her soul? Flaaaaaattering!)
To European-rooted cultures, “dissipation as a path towards enlightenment” is not standard. 😉 Protestantism may traditionally seek fulfilment in Business, Orthodoxy – in Service (no strict borders here, though). Interesting, is there any of these motivations in the background of our porn star’s “dharma”.))) [Humor inside]
* “Telegony” is a breeding phenomenon, when (by actual “supraphysical” interaction or by coincidence) some characteristics of a previous male believably emerge in a female’s progeny from a different male, especially the first one. Is widely practiced in horse breeding, and is somewhat similar to Greek tradition of old men sleeping with boys, for exchanging “mature virility” for “youthful energy”. One more argument not to deal with women complaining on having mixed with “jerks”. )
January 31, 2007 at 6:26 pm
Wonderlander,
I always ask how she is doing, but it is a common courtesy where I come from. What would be the best way to answer her when I talk to her? I want to learn about her, know what she likes, dislikes, her dreams, fears, but how can I do that over phone conversation, and not use the questions that are like “interviews”, “psychoanalyzing” and “interrogations”? I want to be able to get past her defenses and touch her in a way where she wants me to be in contact more with her. How can I do that? If you could give me some advice, it would be invaluable to me. By the way, she is going to be calling me within the next four or five hours, so if you could, please help.
February 1, 2007 at 8:10 am
Yes, we discern between “common courtesy” and “genuine attitude”…
I’m here for private advice.
http://russianwomenspeak.wordpress.com/2006/10/02/east-west-marriage-relationship-psychology-expert-counseling-personal-secrets/
February 8, 2007 at 12:04 pm
January 27th, 2007 at 7:19 pm
Married2abrit..
He has not spent a few MONTHS in Russia.
Rather, he has spent a few YEARS.
He has not met just a FEW Russian women.
Rather, he has met MANY.
There are many things on his site which make this crystal clear. Please get your facts straight before making claims.
Thank You,
Luke Skywalker
hm…you don’t seriously expect me to respect s.o. just based on the fact that they spent A FEW YEARS “there” (as an Am.expat, I presume) and met MANY women “there”(also as an Am. expat), do you?;-)
sounds quite cliche actually …particularly o s.o. who “knosw what the crack is” if you know what I mean…
GL
I seriously don’t see how the issue of Feminism comes into this at all. What is so “feministic” about the woman you met and described? What astonishes me is the general feeling of animousity and dislike between sexes your small article reveales.
What I don’t like is seeing people (Americans in this particular instance) being sold a dream. And they are are notorious for buying into all sorts of dreams. Also, let’s not forget that those on the other end are being sold a dream, too. And when these v.different dreams clash, it creates so much sh..t that it outweighs all alleged benefits…of entering into a relationship with “non-western” women.
And they get “westernized” v.quickly, within 6 or 12 months, i can assure you of that. Eastern European women, unlike South East Asians or Chinese, don’t have a very strong sense of cultural indentity and traditionalism and are v.adaptable to a different culture.
From what I know that those men who b…tch about “feminism” and “western women” find themselves b…tching about Russian, Ukrainian,Eastern European, etc women a few years down the line. A coincidence?
Anyway, this is for the benefit of the Americans who might read this.
2 GL personally, thank you for a warm wellcom in this “thread” and please excuse the tyle of this narration (in a rush)lol
February 9, 2007 at 5:02 am
Then you’ve not looked closely enough Married2aBrit. The way women act in this country is as if alien pod plants came, copied them, then killed the originals just like the Bodysnatchers movie. Only that in this case, feminism isn’t a body snatcher, it’s a soul snatcher. My grandmother was Russian, my father is Ukrainian, so I know full well they do have a strong sense of cultural identity. A lot of people have been slain in the former Yugloslvia over it. If what you way were true, then why did my grandmother, uncle and father who came here continued to speak Russian and Ukrainian, act like a Russian or Ukrainian, and so on? Yes people do adapt when they emmigrate to another country, but to these people their language and culture is as much a part of them as a leg or arm. They won’t discard it at a whim.
Taras
February 9, 2007 at 1:02 pm
Married2abrit..
Is this the best you can do to question my credibility?
I actually think the more appropriate thing to do would be to question yours or lack of..
For Example.. Have you ever been to Russia at all? How long?
Are you “positive” that you know more then I do on this subject?
Or are you here to whine about this blog because it screws up your little idealogical view of the world? Your thinking process is so transparent that it’s hilarious..
“Let’s see us Feminists can claims this, this and this.. oh but wait those damn Russian Women are screwing things up for us.. so we’d better throw mud at them fast!”
I would love to see you create a blog and to see how far you get promoting your ideas behind feminism by the way..
Speaking of which your level of ignorance is astounding if you do not see the obvious relationship between this post and feminism.. So just for your benefit allow me to re-educate you..
One of Feminism’s core tenant has been to promote sexual “liberation” and “empowerment” and “freedom”
In reality these are all nice sounding words to cover up for the phrase.. “Whoring Around”
Feminism deprives women big time by promoting sexual promiscuity which in fact greatly decreases the chance for women to recognize true intimacy and hold onto it.
To compound this Women have a very limited shelf life in the eyes of Men when it comes to them being seriously considered as wife material.. And this is a biological preference that is hardwired by mother nature.. so if you have complaints go to her and not us..
So does a woman sleeping around increase her odds to find Mr. Right? Only in your dreams..
So you can quit spinning this idea that I or the other Men here have animosity against your sex.. Since when does feminism “represent” all women in the world?
I find this funny as hell since this blog is devoted to traditional women here in Russia and you’ve conveniently left that out.. Oh I guess Russian Women don’t fall into your definition of real women..
It’s actually painful to witness your level of ignorance as you claim that “Eastern European Women don’t have a strong sense of cultural identity or traditionalisms” as you put it.
And you want to criticize my credibility?
Sorry but your comments are a case study in lack of class, denial and jealousy..
Or in other words.. you don’t know what the hell you are talking about and I certainly feel sorry for you British husband since he has to put up with that level of arrogance on a daily basis.
Speaking of which.. I’d love to have an interesting chat with him..
Care to introduce us?
GL
February 9, 2007 at 6:26 pm
GL, with all the blames one can lay on feminism, it would be biased to attribute promiscuity to it.
If men were opposed to promiscuity, whom would women “whore around” with? 😉 After ages of self-restraint more assumed than heart-felt, – who’s bragging all over the world about “the disseminating nature of males” to justify hopping from a woman onto a next one? Who’s the perpetual DJ to jam the disk all along the line “so you don’t love me then”, which has been the top nuisance for Russian baboushkas when they were virgins? Who invents this Russian humor “keeping virginity for the wedding has good chance to succeed for the funeral”?
What you’ve described in the post can be called “whorring”; proving puddings by eating in the course of a relationship can not. I’ll be surprised – and suspicious! – if any contemporary man, Russian or Western, proposes to a woman before they’ve slept….
Oops. :*) I’ve heard 4 do so in my life, LOL!! And it was only one of them who could be taken any seriously… my ex.)
Who turned out to be a wild propagandist of promiscuity, however devoted for many years. )
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
February 9, 2007 at 7:53 pm
Natalia,
I respectfully disagree with you on that. On the surface your point seems valid but if you look deeper it’s not. So let me explain.
Natalia.. you women and not us men control whether Sex happens or not..
You control the Green, Yellow and Red Traffic Lights..
Dr. Laura is also in agreement with this point in emphasizing that a Man’s sexuality is such that if almost any woman decides to give a man sex he will almost certainly take it if he’s been without it for long enough.. And this is hard wired into his genetics.
The reverse is not generally true for a woman..
So although the feminist for years have been crying hypocrisy the deeper biology issues don’t justify their screams.
Again life is unfair.. so right or wrong we can learn to accept reality or we constantly try to alter or cover it up with disastrous results..
A woman has much more to lose in her life by having sex with a man who is a bad partner for her. Therefore the level of caution she must exercise is greater then with most men. And this is still the case even with the advent of birth control.. For example STD’s effect more women then men in this world for obvious physiological reasons. But for the purposes of this discussion promiscuity has a far greater emotional and mental health toll on women in general then with men.
When Feminism promotes sexual equality.. what it is really promoting is emotional and personal disasters for women..
I’m sorry if the word “whoring” is harsh.. but if it can be used to prevent an unwanted baby, abortion or broken families then that’s a small price to pay..
GL
February 9, 2007 at 11:54 pm
OK, you got me started. You really shouldn’t do that. These are more the musings and ramblings that this subject brings up for me, than an argument for or against either point of view. And if it sounds like I’m putting words in someone’s mouth, I’m not – just going off on my own tangent.
One of the MANY hypocrisies of feminists is that they promote sexual equality and sexual “empowerment” for women (you go, girl!), then blame men and patriarchal oppression whenever a woman has sex with a man and regrets it later. Suddenly women are helpless victims, who can’t be expected to make responsible decisions, and aren’t responsible for their actions and the consequences of them. And when a baby results, it might as well be manna from heaven – “choice” comes into play only then. A woman can’t be “forced” to raise a baby she now doesn’t want! But the man has to endorse a blank check for the next 22 years of his life. But I digress…
Promiscuity has an emotional price for a man too, in its way. Unless I’m unique, sex isn’t as simple and straightforward as men like to think it is for them. I’ve found that “tasting the pudding” too soon, or focusing on it too much, has clouded my judgment and led to some very bad decisions, and then made it hard to extricate myself from them. In my first sexual relationship, there were a lot of other problems and incompatibilities, but I always avoided dealing with them because the sex was so great that I didn’t want to rock the boat. (Hey, I was just a kid then. Funny thing is, I did the same thing a couple years ago.) I have a friend who’s getting divorced for the third time, after 2 years of little communication and almost no sex, and his first thought was “now I can sleep with other women!” To me, this borders on sex addiction and will just keep him on the merry-go-round of pain he’s been on (and I’ve told him so.)
Sex is like a powerful drug that keeps a man from thinking straight. It’s also like eating chocolate cake before dinner, which bombards the taste buds with such an intense and (relatively) uncomplicated taste that it’s impossible to enjoy the subtler flavors of the rest of the meal. Not to mention killing your appetite for them in the first place. The difference is that just thinking about sex a lot can be almost as impairing as the real thing.
Even if we can say that our grandparents’ morals came from mindless dogma, or were honored more in the breach, they were on to something even if it was for the wrong reasons. (It’s always been easier to enforce values by internalizing fear and stigma, than by helping people understand themselves.) Liberals/feminists, who believe that we are all blank slates, like to believe that these values are arbitrary and imposed on us by society. But I think that often they spring from a deep understanding of human psychology (and the human spirit, if such a thing exists), even if they go off the rails somewhere along the way.
Liberal social engineering, encouraging us to throw off the shackles of “artificially imposed standards”, carelessly tinkers with these human truths, out of intellectual concepts and a childish faith that “everything will be great then, you’ll see!” Just as socialism tries to outlaw human nature. I love the quote from Jim(?) Quinn, a talk show host out of Pittsburgh: “A liberal is someone who thinks that 5,000 years of human experience is obsolete, now that HE’S here.” (And “Liberalism always generates the exact opposite of its stated intent.”)
Where was I?? There are lots of biological urges and hardwiring that we recognize need to be overcome, tempered, or sublimated in order for us to be more human (whatever that means) – aggression, selfishness, strong dominating weak, etc. These are all natural and in a sense blameless, except that if we want something more, something higher for ourselves, we need to deal with them. I think sex is in this category. It’s not enough to say “men are driven to spread their seed and that’s that.” Not that that’s not true, and not that it’s evil or perverted. But if we want something more for ourselves, it’s worth examining how much it gets in the way of that.
Lately I’ve been trying to do just that. I suppose I could be accused of turning a necessity into a virtue.. But over the years I’ve gotten a lot of down-to-earth insight on the subject from writings as varied as Pope Pius and Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh. It comes down to the yogic philosophy of freeing yourself from being a slave to both your attractions and aversions, and bringing some consciousness to your decisions and actions, so that you’re acting in your own best interest. Or Ayn Rand’s “rational self-interest.” It’s as simple as that! (Yeah, right :?).
I gotta go.
February 10, 2007 at 12:59 pm
Taras
You must have misunderstood what I said or I hadn’t expressed it clearly enough: i am not saying that Russian, Ukrainian, Belourussian women or popultation in general do not retain their language or culture when they come over here. It’s just they have a stronger tendency to blend in with the new society and adjust their ways accordingly (unlike Chinese or East Asian cultures).Also, you are talking about older generation ( i assume), let’s not forget that everything is changing rapidly over there and Russia today is not what it used to be five years ago. Far from it. The change has been massive and increasingly in favour of western values.
And for Christ’s sake, how do you manage to drag Yugoslavia into this? Europe may be just a tiny blotch on the map, but if you take Russia and one of former Yugoslavia Republics (never call , say, a Croatian a Yugoslav, by the way lol)they are seriously a world apart.
GL
There’s absolutely no need to get so “p..ssed” or work yourself into a state over this.
(By the way, it would be much easier if this discussion board had “quote” feature.)
If you want to keep banging on about feminism (still can’t see what is so “feministic” about a woman getting men to pay lol, in your little story), just let me point something out to you.
Have you ever thought WHY feminism never caught on in the Soviet Union and actually never made its way there? What was the reason behind it? Well, you will say Communism and Iron Curtain.
Quite right. But wasn’t it Communism that set women free in 1918, a lot earlier than it happened in Western societies? They were given rights equal to men (vote, work etc) from the word go.(At one point they even considered abolishing family and marriages which luckily never happened). Do you know when women were given a right to go out and do what they wanted in the Western society, 50s was it or 60s? (British women were given a right to vote equal to men in 1928.)
So who set the trend? ( And who hasn’t done his homework on this subject?;-))
Five generations of women (Russian and the like) used to going out and doing what they wanted and being in charge of their (and often their families) lives is not something to sniff at. Please take it from someone who was …ah well …born and raised there, this is your last chance to win back your “credibility”:-)
I am generally thrilled by the fact that I was put into a category of “western women”:-)
I don’t do blogs (the hint is taken though) and neither does my spouse who, incidentally, tends to get very rude (or over polite, which is essentially the same thing) when introduced to Americans.
So the answer is No.
On second thought, if you are s.o. who likes selling fridges to escimos, you know where to find me. We’ll have fun.
February 10, 2007 at 2:54 pm
Married2aBrit..
I LOVE IT!
You just questioned my credibility and completely SCREWED your own credibility in the process..
I love it when people like you challenge me on my knowledge of history..
In your attempt to justify the Bolshevik revolution of 1918 for “liberating women” you conveniently left out the fact that these decisions created complete Societal Chaos in Russia.
Don’t believe me?
Well here’s a following excerpt for you so that we can clear up your ignorance..
=======================================
“The Bolsheviks took power in 1917 and declared a separation of church and state. Thus the Russian Orthodox Church found itself without official state backing for the first time in its history.” (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russian_Orthodox_Church)
Abolishing the ‘oppressive’ patriarchal family came next. Toward this end, universal moral law was tossed aside, wives and mothers were forced into factories, abortions made free, and divorces attained within minutes. Catastrophe ensued: “When the Bolsheviki came into power in 1917, they regarded the family…with fierce hatred and set out…to destroy it. One must live in Russia today, amid the atmosphere of torment, disgust, and disillusionment that pervades sex relations, the chaos, uncertainty, and tragedy that hover over the Russian family…Some men have twenty wives, living a week with one, a month with another…Abortions cover our villages with shame. Formerly we did not even hear of them.” (The Russian Effort to Abolish Marriage, by a Woman Resident in Russia; Atlantic Monthly, Vol.138, No.1, pp 108-114, July 1926).
Bolsheviks ‘liberated’ thousands upon thousands of hapless children from their ‘oppressive’ families. Taking control of schools, they filled the heads of children with worthless propaganda, atheism, and extreme sex education. Additionally, children were psychologically manipulated into not only turning against their own families, but into spying upon them as well. The consequences were enormous: devastated families, destroyed lives: child rapists, murderers, thieves, bullies, and outright sociopaths.
‘Equality’ (sameness) was created between “natural intercourse” and the paraphilias, including sodomy. “Concerning…sodomy, and various other forms of sexual gratification, which are set down in European legislation as offenses against public morality—Soviet legislation treats these the same as so-called ‘natural intercourse.” (Soviet Union in the 1920s: Scientific, Not Utopian” http://www.workers.org)
Like falling dominoes, the collapsing family led to the fall of social order, culture, and then the economy, unleashing a tidal wave of crime, corruption, sexual debauchery, and chaos. When Stalin came to power, he took immediate steps to restore order. The family and ethics were restored, abortion and divorce made difficult to obtain, and sodomy, gender-bendering, etc. were re-criminalized. In taking these steps, Stalin destroyed the Bolshevik’s ‘revolution,’.
Taken from “New Bolshevism in America?” by Linda Kimball
=======================================
So as you say Married2aBrit.. is this really “my last chance to restore my credibility?”
Or this really a golden opportunity for you to be exposed as a “Useful Idiot” as Lenin himself would declare?
Oh and give your husband my regards..
GL
February 12, 2007 at 2:21 pm
Craig – you’ve rather taken the words out of my mouth )) (well I’m not surprised you enjoy Osho too, and might suspect that you also know Barbara de Angelis with her genially clear rules about “don’t jump into the bed unless…”).
GL, I can agree that it was “liberation” that introduced the new standards (suggesting the menfolk “f*** the control lights, creep on or find another street” ;))…
and, as far as I understood, the main sin of your post’s “case” was not encouraging heavy traffic but collecting tolls for approaching…
What I’m really curious to hear is your and fellow gentlemen’s positions on the issue: on what conditions, and how soon, should sex begin. Nowadays, and for the speaker himself.
I think this “poll” would be a valuable reference to assist nice understanding, free of wrong steps and disappointments to both parties.
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
Yes and I wish everyone a romantic St.Valentine’s day!
I might become a rare guest for awhile: my super-duper American partner arrives with super-duper programmers, to pitch into that agency I promised in “Holiday gifts” on the occasion of Christmas. 😉
February 12, 2007 at 8:10 pm
Comrade Natalia, I’ll be the first to answer your poll.
I personally believe after marriage is the correct time. It’s less hurtful for a breakup if you haven’t had sex during the courting/dating phase. The commitment isn’t iron-clad until vows are taken.
I don’t know exactly how to express my feeling about this and make sense.
That’s my 2 cents. I listen to Dr. Laura a lot for those of you who have not noticed. 😀
February 15, 2007 at 10:38 pm
Just popped in to see how the discussion was developing (didn’t realize BTW there was pre-moderation on this discussion board).
GL
Why on Earth are you lecturing me on the horrors Bolsheviks brought about or havoc they wrought in Russia and subsequently other Soviet republics? As if this is a point in case.
The fact remains : they are stronger and more wilful and independent than any woman you wish to meet over here. So why talk a load of b..cks,basically?;-)Trying to sell them as some docile, out of this world, I-solve-all-your problems and love-you-forever-for-what-you-are girls of your dreams? It’s a little insulting, actually lol
Can’t quite beleive you failed to take my point on this. V.frustrating.
P.S.I can copy and paste too, you know;) As well as use Google search engine.
February 15, 2007 at 10:52 pm
GL, I’m beginning to think that married2abrit needs a profile, too, just like mongoose.
–Luke
February 16, 2007 at 6:16 am
Married2abrit,
Your attempt at SAVING FACE and SPIN is what is REALLY Hilarious.
Everyone can read this thread. You made a stupid assertion about the Communists “setting women free” in 1918 and I NAILED you on it.
And NO I’m not going to let you get away with it Married2abrit.
Because now you want to “agree” with me and say “Oh but of course the Bolsheviks were horrible blah blah blah..”
So now since your first attempt to throw a bomb actually BLEW UP in your OWN FACE..
NOW you want to try to throw a different one with your
“Trying to sell them as some docile, out of this world, I-solve-all-your problems and love-you-forever-for-what-you-are girls of your dreams? It’s a little insulting”
Married2abrit.. everyone here can see the painful truth that you are completely FULL OF IT..
When you accuse me of promoting simple generalizations you are only revealing your own Jealousy and Denial just like every other Feminist who has come here to try to shoot off their mouth..
Get a life Married2abrit..
Do you understand how strange it is for someone like you who fundamentally disagrees with the premise behind this blog to keep on compulsively coming back for more?
Hmm.. Something doesn’t sound right..
Or in the Eternal Words of Forest Gump..
“My Mama always said that Stupid is as Stupid Does..”
February 16, 2007 at 10:04 am
lol oh what a bunch of …doesn’t matter;)
there must be something that irritates you in my aliase…hence strenuous attempts to portray me as ignorant or “stupid”…defensiveness? for the fear of confirming your reputation…relax, I do not think all Americans are stupid or ignorant…
April 30, 2007 at 7:58 am
Wow. What a maze.
Back to the top again. I think that your basic point is whatever happened to the Western woman’s nesting urge?
So complex how they did it.
I think one of the implied questions is, “Will they ever get it back?”
The easy answer is, “Who cares?”
The more relevent answer is, “When”?
Who’s the boss of me? My God and my biology or my keepers, my society?
Our Western experiment is such a disaster. So much turmoil and ruined lives.
I read recently about the quest of the West to keep Russia weak. Could it be that their traditional Feminine culture is a part of the threat to the Western model as well as all the other usual political and resources factors?
It is extremely important to consider intent. Sometimes life doesn’t roll right for the happiness factor. It’s life.
However, I think your point is that they have become their own worst enemies and that time is an unforgiving teacher.
And what about those who had to live in the pre-perestroika era? and had no idea of the wonder of Russian girls and would have been slammed for either going there or being there?
In other words, when the only choices here have been “not a baby with you dear [Feminazi] one”, then the whole ideal timeline couldn’t happen.
Is it true that when a Feminazi says no to the traditional Feminine role, that she does this via a belittling of the traditional masculine role?
A rhetorical question.
Destiny, purpose, and fulfillment. Three huge subjects.
Prostitutes? Generally a different sexual attitude in the rurals than the cities. In the rurals everyone knows far too much about you. In the cities opportunity can meet desire.
Even a feminine girl is designed to enjoy pleasure. Ah, but context. Within a role portrayed in the West as tantamount to a raw deal for the girl. “Cry Freedom my sisters.”
When all along the prison they thought they were escaping from is the very one they live in.
The big lie–or at least one of them; has overridden the natural highest status of wife and mother.
Name how many people who ask, “What does she do?” in the West, instead of “Does she have her man and her child?” as in Eurasia.
Some pretty potent mindbending to condition our God-given biology in exchange for the Feminazi myth. What a bill of goods.
Have a look at various philosophies and ask which one most says that there is no appreciable difference between anyone. We are all the same. bs
The debate over double standards may be better served by the “long live our differences”, as the French are known to have said.
What is she looking for? I think knowing this answer can then answer the question more directly. Notwithstanding the whole experimental or discovery phase.
September 28, 2007 at 2:49 am
And YOU think you’re any better? I laugh at women who think they’re like some young cupcake when they are slathered in tats and look like sun dried leather ROFL…….yeah the word for women like that is cougar. Get the $&%@ out of here before I demonstrate why Slavs like myself consider the likes of you the Devil’s rejects. You’re just a sore loser, that’s all and yes I am a man, not a woman with a mis-spelled name you nitwit!
Taras
September 28, 2007 at 8:05 am
Taras: Well said, brother. U made my day 😉 😀
Giselle: Lol @ U. Your’e just showing us how disturbed and psychotic you really are, which we knew from when you first crawled in here. You’re making yourself a laughing stock, and you don’t even realise it.
She doesn’t even sound Russian. She sounds like a typical anglosphere feminazi. GL: What do you think?
Giselle, my new name for you is JW (=Jaded Whore), becuase thats what you are.
September 28, 2007 at 5:49 pm
Giselle Says:
September 27, 2007 at 5:42 pm
“Oh shut up, you guys act like you are saints and have never dumped a woman or used her when she didnt deserve it.”
Giselle, ever hear the saying “You can’t cheat an honest man?” I have an analagous saying: “You can’t use a nice girl.” Why do women think they’re victims if some guy “uses” them for sex? Didn’t they have the option of saying no? And I would never claim to be a saint myself-far from it! 😈
Giselle also says:
“Men always ignore their own aging process and go around with the idea that their Gods gift to everyone, so why shouldnt some women?”
Not to brag, but there are many places in the world where beautiful young women DO treat me as if I’m God’s gift to them (and most of them haven’t asked me for a penny, in case you were thinking they were just after my money). Whereas a fat, middle-aged American ho will think that she’s irresistible to men without a shred of evidence to back her up; they’re living in a fantasy world.
September 28, 2007 at 8:05 pm
She most certainly is not a Russian, Giselle is not a Russian name and the way she speaks her mind is most un-Russian as well. I think she’s a jaded western woman who’s crying sour grapes. Many western women are angry because men are invoking options other than premature death living with them. Moreover, she wouldn’t like Russian men, many western women don’t like them upon first sight. Oh well, little nut cases like her can lie in the bed of barbed razor wire they made for themselves.
Taras
October 8, 2008 at 6:21 am
hmm. interesting read, the artcile and the comments. Temting for another rant .LOL
There is REASON not DOGMA behind why so many cultures insist on post marital sex only. There is a very spirtual and scientific reason.
Auric Imprinting of the wife occurs post coitally and this vibration stays for months after every few days of contact.The Semen of a man has his entire spiritual evolution and Karma , the genetic code. if we can contract Aids which is an immune condition not even a disease, it shouldnt be hard to accept what sexual imprints involve. If the girl has pre-marital sex and marries the same bloke, no problems but if the husband is different, now there is a remnant vibrational frequency of another man in her aura. If that boyfriend is afflicted by some Karmic misdeeds and is in anguish, some of that frequency will resonate in the girl’s aura and this will affect her health, her mood and also her husband’s mood and so on.
Same works in the reverse too. If you notice many businessmen suddenly having badluck after they get a fortune, it is because the first thing they do after making a million is celebrate with an addition of slutty mistresses who could have been imprinted by drug dealers or convicts a few weeks back.
The girls here are luckier though, they aurically drain the wealth consciousness of the newly rich fool.
In MOST cases the imprints of previous sexual partners act as a hindrance to attracting a soul mate. especially when the imprints are of negative nature…case in point an Ameriskank who has you in the troes os a spiral of bad relationships ..one after another
Also even if u DO attract a fine partner Multiple sexual imprints on the both the sides spoil the connection.
Basically when you sleep with someone you sleep with EVERYONE he/she has slept with.Infact that is the MAIN reason being a Shrink is so lucrative and WHY the Illuminati introduced Casual Sex.esp. for women its catastrophic.A women with too many sexual imprints of too many partners feels out of focus, and finds herself drifting thru life.It can also cause personality disorders and mental illness.
As for men, they find that there energy being scattered among so many women makes them feel scattered, out of centre and not at peace.
A mentalist, who has developed many meditation techniques has developed a method whereby these sexual imnprints from past partners can be released and one can actually attract a soulmate if one wants of course : ) thru the help of their Higher self.
I can mail the techniques to you GL so u can post it or mail it to anyone who asks, or you can display my address for anyone who wants to try it, i will mail it to them. I had posted it on an american astrology blog at request. 10 girls tried and successfully came out of negative relationship patterns. one said she felt so at peace she was never going to ” Hook Up ” gain. and three have attracted soulmates thru nothing less than unbelievable circumstances.AND they are getting married !!!
A few months ago i also posted the above in Henry Makow’s site and quite a few mailed me asking for the same. So far i have received excellent feedback.
also this book makes Great reading — ” Reality of Sexuality” by Stewart Swerdlow. It goes into how the Illuminati is using Sexuality to manipulate the human race since ages and it gives many mental and meditation techniques to release sexual programming and build a good monogamous relationship.
my email is shefbabe@gmail.com
October 8, 2008 at 6:23 am
ooh forgot to add, condoms mininmise Sexual imprinting 😉
October 8, 2008 at 7:57 am
Hi Venusdeindia,
That is a very interesting post you’ve made. Thanks for the insight from a karma and chakra point of view.
By all means please post more on this subject if you wish. Its certainly given me much to think about.
GL
October 8, 2008 at 9:27 am
{{ By all means please post more on this subject if you wish. Its certainly given me much to think about. }}
hmmm, like what ?
I didnt think it would be wise to post more Estoric jib-jab…i don’t want to appear New-Agey you know 😉
But seriously ,i was trained to do this, so well…to understansd the spiritual implications of Sexuality
from a westerners point of view… and its no offence, i only imply a difference in psychological mechanisms that necessitate a different approach.
There is enough to fill books on how our Emotional Growth is dependent obn our Sexual Maturity and so it has been.. so i will give a general gist.
Our sexual nature mirrors the Creative processes of God, or as we easterners would say Yin-Christ and Yang-Sophia.As souls we are all bisexual, but we choose a male or female body to experience the feelings associated with the the same, which are not EQUAL but remarkably different.In order for us to grow through the 4 phases of life we need to move on sexually…if you see around you a 40 year old woman acting like a narcissistic 4 yr old it is because she has not acted out the sexual roles that would have led to her maturity…same applies for
Men. You have heard that joke ??? the intelligence of a 30 yr old American is same as that of a 13 yr old Indian..well no offence but yeah…not in terms of IQ scores though..in terms of the intelligence that one accrues from experiental learning through life’s many colors.
GL, you can attest cant you ? havent you remarked that one should add 10 yrs to the age of a Russian girl , so as to know her age in American years ???
That is what the Feministts hacve accomplished, Women and consequently Men frozen at the sexual maturity of an Adolescent..Permanent Puberty with no Functional relational abilities…Isolation from feelings of others and from those of oneself…HURRRRAY
heres a quote from an essay..
——————————————
Our brain is not One but in fact as a little googling will reveaal made up of 7 parts or circuits, each for one chakra in the human body.
The first four circuits are of primary importance because the majority of humanity gets trapped in these circuits for numerous reasons, some of which are intentional and others due to pure ignorance. Each circuit corresponds to a different level of evolution and increasing degree of brain function, which can be translated as a increase in harmonious relations with self and others. Hence, the importance of the complete maturation of brain function to the individual and society as a whole. Anatomically each circuit relates to specific characteristic behaviors seen in particular species of animals and insects that will give deeper insight to a circuit a individual or group is locked in
Opening circuits 1 through 7 equals 100% of brain function and is the full experience of LOVE, which is everything or reality(kyo chi myogo). In this state one recognizes and experiences them self and the Universe as the same thing. This is the complete and wholesome state of an individual, which is the divine right and creative expression inherent within each individual human-being.
In Hermeticism, the above is called transcending oneself. Before transcendence, each individual is in effect acting under the influence of the “collective soul”, described by Jung as “the collective unconscious”. In this type of limited morphic resonance, the individual is directed by an invisible force that manages each species of the animal kingdom in relation to reproduction, seasonal migration, territorial demarcation, ect. The power to transform results from the profound understanding of the laws of nature, which are also harnessed in conjunction with hands on healing techniques.
It is a nobel path among healers to bring the realization of this type of reality into existence. Healership is the product of life long discipline and focus on divine truth and the awareness that has to be translated into a portion of the science of life processes, which brings an individual back to his or her original order. The Universal Family is the product of individuals that have moved into truth and love by an association with a individual that can translate these realities into human behavior.
Love is nature and is also the powerful energy transformed into the physical dimension through the human heart with unlimited wisdom. This love has two sides to it; one born of darkness, called Corrupt Love(fundamental darkness), and another born of light, called Divine Love(Buddha nature).
Corrupt Love is found in a humanity that is locked in the first 3 circuits of brain function. The contrasting concepts of corrupt and divine are simply related to the divine as the natural state and the corrupt as the unnatural, or, the natural corrupted and perverted state.
Humanity is in need of a divine plan back to order from within. Healing the dysfunctions from the perspective of the 7circuits is universal to all people and cultures.
In human reality, chaos and disorder are present with much greater effect than the power of an ordered structure. For this reason it is essential that the knowledge of the 7 circuits of brain function become noted as a precursor for the development of the true human family. John Baines the author of “ The Science of Love” states that, “ men and women separately are only halves of a whole; an incomplete reality of one total truth.” It is this integral structure which lovers unconsciously try to achieve. Because of incomplete use of 100% brain function, mankind can only simulate love and that is why love for man, is confusing, sensual, deceptive and soul-killing. Man’s ability to love is contaminated with the void of untruths and illusions, which have there foundations in incomplete consciousness, as it relates to limited brain function. Only those who use their intelligence properly can aspire to a awareness of Divine Love. Those who are guided by base and selfish motives cannot imagine the existence of a higher love. They are content with the simple mating habits of animals. Higher love is achieved through conscious awareness. This is the foundation of the Universal Family. As an individual heals them self through the maturation of the brain circuits, they begin to re- orient their value system towards spiritually/ consciousness based awareness, that includes higher principles of the heart as described by the Buddha as the treasure of the heart. The final objective of the Buddha’s life is the global realization of this deep spiritual awareness of the heart based on the opening of the inherent Buddha nature within each individual, which has been called Kosen Rufu.
Divine Love satisfies the body, mind and spirit. All people who operate from purely instinctual contexts (1st circuit) are excluded from the possibility of attaining true love, 100% brain function. The key to love is transcendence of the baser side of Nature.
Corrupt Love leads invariably to psychological and spiritual self-destruction. The dissolution submits the individual to the raw force of Nature(Kyo), which over the course of time gradually absorbs the person in it’s stronger principles until they begin to lose their higher faculties and begin to exhibit a solidification of their bestial side, the first 3 circuits. John Baines adds that, “a man who might possess exquisite qualities becomes a boor and a caricature of what he once was, and a woman, delicate, lovely and refined, gradually becomes hard and vulgar. These changes are not necessarily the result of aging, but of the rupture of natural principles.”
(( Basically he is trying to talk about the repercussions of Free Love }}
In light of the above, healing the incomplete circuits of brain function holographically sets the foundation for healing the individual and the universal family, that is comprised of psychologically and spiritually evolved individuals of each gender. Every individual has an inherent longing that can only be found within the universal human family.
In conclusion, an individual can not realize his or her full potential without completing each of the 7 circuits. A healer and each individual can set the foundation for healing the universal human family through understanding the function and nature of the 7 circuits. When this insight has been established, it can be clearly seen that all dysfunctions within society and human culture have their origins within the misunderstanding and ignorance of the 7 circuits of brain function. Healing the first 4 circuits becomes the foundation of health and well-being within all people. Overall, a person is not fulfilled as a human being until they have completed the true relationship to Family and SELF.
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Which is IMPOSsIBLE to accomplish in a Femanised culture