I was reviewing some of my earlier posts and realized that I really enjoy it when somebody tosses a good question my way.
It turns out that some of the more interesting posts I’ve put out have always started out this way.
Keep in mind that some of my previous posts may have already addressed your questions but go ahead and fire away and let’s see if we can all try to spread some potential enlightenment on our favorite subject.
Russian Women - The Real Truth 
October 8, 2007 at 2:51 pm
I have learned a great deal about Russian femininity from your site, and really enjoy it. I was wondering if you’d care to comment on *older* Russian women?
Do you think it’s built into the gene pool that Russian women grow, um “stockier” as they grow older, or is that just the result of the really poor diets these women had during Soviet times?
October 8, 2007 at 3:42 pm
burning question…
Certainly you must at some point deal with her parents and other family. Please tell us more of this experience. What are their cold war memories and opinions of westerners?
October 8, 2007 at 6:53 pm
I have a really good comment…
I just found out that Craig who posts on this website is actually a high ranking member of the MRM, except that he never told anybody!
Actually, Craig has been part of the MRM since at least 1995! He’s been part of the MRM for almost as long as Masculist Man has been part of the MRM.
http://64.233.167.104/search?q=cache:_38NAuOQJZEJ:bad.eserver.org/issues/1995/23/newitz.html+%22craig+moberg%22&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=1&gl=us
October 8, 2007 at 8:33 pm
Yup. So?
High ranking? I doubt it. No chevrons on my uniform. I held a Take Back the Penis rally with a friend in Harvard Square over 10 years ago. I think I mentioned it here several months ago. GL’s writings about men, women, masculinity and femininity are what attracted me to his blog. Coincidence? No. Conspiracy? You decide.
I actually had nothing to do with the million man march, or wrote anything about it in Backlash. But I’ve seen this article before. My “quote” was either sloppy journalism or (more likely) the abovementioned friend putting words in my mouth. He had a habit of doing that.
But I’m honored, Luke, that you’re googling me trying to dig up dirt.
October 8, 2007 at 9:33 pm
GL, I just realized what thread this is – for asking questions of you, not for more petty bickering among the peanut gallery. Sorry about that.
October 10, 2007 at 1:44 pm
What do russian women think about foreigners coming to their country?
Do russian women have racial preferences?
There are a lot of desperate guys travelling…Do russian women think they are losers because they have to travel to get a woman?
Thanks
October 10, 2007 at 8:01 pm
Hello. To the guy that’s started this blog, you have my thanks. What you’re doing is a great service to mankind.
To introduce myself, I’m 21, and I’ve already been awakened to the fact that most American women of the past few generations are disgusting (not all but many are). Its obvious that most of the men here are in their late 30’s to early 40’s (not that I really care, not my concern to begin with). I was willing to know was that what do Russian women think of men my age? Or is it that they look for older financially stable men?
October 11, 2007 at 12:22 am
Hey Meg,
I’m not a regular poster on this particular site, but I do stop by from time to time as I have an interest in Russian culture. I think the answer to your question is fairly obvious. People gain weight because they take in more calories than they burn. Only about 1% gain weight because they have a “glandular problem.” I think the old adage is true: “if you want to know what a person is going to look like in their old age, look at their parents.”
If you’re potential mother-in-law stunt doubles for shamu on the weekends, then it’s likely your wife will to.
Regards,
Shinobi-Todd
October 11, 2007 at 4:57 am
Hi Folks,
Thanks for the great questions..
Been real busy here so be patient and I plan on answering them with a detailed future post.
So keep firing them off.
GL
October 11, 2007 at 12:08 pm
The question from Akhand was quite good.
Briefly:
Generally, they prefer men of the white/European races.
Most treat foreign men with a sort of curiosity – often a good thing, but not necessarily anything more than that. You will certainly get many “looks”, even if you are trying not to stand-out.
Re: “Do russian women think they are losers…”
For some, it’s not so much them looking down on the foreign men, but the local women who seek them. A girl who seeks a foreign husband is sometimes looked down-upon because it may seem as if she can not be successful locally. Of course, you can put some of that down to a type of jealousy (that’s more related to that “curiosity” factor more than saying the foreign guys are necessarily a great catch).
One reality is that some Russian girls simply decide that they do not want a Russian man, most often due to the widespread drinking culture amongst Russian men, but also the indifference often displayed by men toward women.
Often when a Russian girl does find a foreign husband, it meets with great approval from friends and family (and maybe jealousy from others), as it is assumed that she has a better chance of finding a “good man” – and that man gains respect for the great lengths he has gone to, to find love and form a family (with a worthy partner) in a foreign land. Win-win.
From my own experiences (being an “average” looking guy), it is very easy to gain attention without trying. As I mentioned, you can put a lot of it down to curiosity more than anything else, but attention of the more substantial kind is certainly easier to come-by than in Western societies. It is also much more natural and beautiful.
There are no “losers” other than those who are too afraid to take the journey down the path of love, marriage and fatherhood.
Just do it with right woman!
(that’s the crucial & challenging part!)
October 11, 2007 at 5:44 pm
Hey GL, here’s a burning question: Will I get killed if I go to Russia? Today a Russian classmate of mine told me don’t go to Russia, you’ll be killed if you do.
October 11, 2007 at 6:25 pm
Lol Hero.
Come here to South Africa. You have the highest probability of getting killed here, after Chechnya and Iraq. 🙂
October 11, 2007 at 6:34 pm
From a sample of 62 countries only.
Full list at http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/cri_mur_percap-crime-murders-per-capita
#1 Colombia: 0.617847 per 1,000 people
#2 South Africa: 0.496008 per 1,000 people
…
#5 Russia: 0.201534 per 1,000 people
…
#7 Estonia: 0.107277 per 1,000 people
#8 Latvia: 0.10393 per 1,000 people
#9 Lithuania: 0.102863 per 1,000 people
#10 Belarus: 0.0983495 per 1,000 people
#11 Ukraine: 0.094006 per 1,000 people
…
#13 Kyrgyzstan: 0.0802565 per 1,000 people
#14 Thailand: 0.0800798 per 1,000 people
#15 Moldova: 0.0781145 per 1,000 people
…
#20 Poland: 0.0562789 per 1,000 people
#21 Georgia: 0.0511011 per 1,000 people
…
#24 United States: 0.042802 per 1,000 people
…
October 11, 2007 at 6:40 pm
Would my odds go up in Russia since I’m American?
October 11, 2007 at 6:45 pm
Probably.
Everyone hates Americans.
Pretend your’e Canadian.
Everyone loves Canadians.
October 11, 2007 at 8:17 pm
Hi Meg,
Your observation about large older Russian Women was one of the first things I tried to figure out when I got here.
So here is what I’ve noticed.
In general women in their 30’s to 40’s either remained married or went unmarried. The ones who were married tended to be in better shape. I think that the competitive landscape of this country had something to do with it.
Women who were in the single catagory tended to be larger. I believe this was due to them either deciding to let go of themselves along with the fact that they tended to have a lower income which would often lead to a diet that was rich in sugars and carbohydrates. Potatos, pastas, bread, and lots of sweets.
Now this effect is especially pronounced when these women get into their 50’s and beyond. Most of these women are not married anymore due to divorce or the high mortality rate that Russian Men in this age bracket have. At this point they have very little to lose diet wise and really tend to let it all hang out.
Again I’d have to say that the primary variable in my opinion with this was whether or not the woman was married or not.
Thanks for the great question..
Hope this provides some insight Meg.
GL
October 11, 2007 at 8:19 pm
Ceiver your question deserves a post all to itself. Meeting the parents or the mother for a Russian girl is a serious affair.. And getting it right is pretty important and requires some effort in explaining.
So stay tuned.
GL
October 11, 2007 at 8:32 pm
Hi Akhand,
I honestly don’t care what race you or anyone else is.
What I care about is your level of cultivation.. And so will the Russian ladies here as well.
Your classical social skills and gentlemanly graces will go far here. You can’t change your nationality so why bother even thinking about it.
What you can change is your cultural outlook and the way you appear and express yourself. This is not easy for most guys because they maybe too set in their ways and don’t really have the motivation or knowledge to know how to change into the RIGHT DIRECTION.
I’ve seen many different nationality of guys out here.. and you can usually spot out quickly who is going to bomb and who will walk away a happy man and I don’t believe it’s because of his nationality. A big part of it comes down to humility, genuineness, and a willingness to adopt to a very different culture.
Or in other words cultivation, cultivation, cultivation..
If for example you are Chinese but you act like you came from some impoverished Chinese Village.. well you are probably going to bomb. Basically it all boils down to how westernized (in the old traditional sense) is your identity and self-expression?
I remember writing a post about this that you might want to re-visit.
Good luck..
GL
October 11, 2007 at 8:34 pm
Hero I think you will be just fine.. The more friends you have in your network the better obviously..
GL
October 13, 2007 at 8:11 am
Nice piece, and she represents a far better alternative to American women.
However, here in the Caucasus region, Russian women are drooled over and are seen as the best women in the world too. I have to disagree and say that this is but their reputation. Caucasus women have the darker hair and skin tone that I find more attractive with all the other benefits of RW. Last week I had two RW come on to me. They were fat and not attractive, so much so that I thought they were western women. They kept coming back to my table and I was offended that they could not accept that I was not into them. This Russian Women are the best in the world, is beginning to infect their thinking as this young girl illustrated.
Travel to the Balkans, the Caucasus, and Central Europe before you buy into the hype.
Happy hunting…..
October 13, 2007 at 6:32 pm
Are any of these Russian women Bible believing Chritians or do they continue to embrace a fallen scientific, atheistic worldview?
October 14, 2007 at 3:49 am
Mick,
Most Russian Women claim to be “Christian” but what they are really saying is that they are Orthodox Christian. Orthodox Christianity is older and very different from any mainstream form of Christianity in the US.
If you belong to one of the popular denominations of Christianity in the US then you probably would not recognize what happens in an Russian Orthodox Church.
In addition to that most girls that I know who claim to be (Orthodox) Christian hardly ever go to church. Maybe they attend once or twice a year if at all.
There is very little activism or community involvement with churches here. 70 years of Communism did a great job of purging that and driving people away from religion an into the arms of the state.
However more and more girls believe in God but any discussion of it in public seems to be a big social no no.
Again this is an old tradition with roots in Communism since openly religious people were scorned or persecuted. Secrecy and non-disclosure still rules the day. And this severely constrains the development of religion in this society since many people are still afraid to openly acknowledge a belief in God since being ridiculed as a person who believes in “superstition” is considered to be worse.
So yes Christianity exists but merely in title only. And if you are looking for a Girl who embraces Western Style Christian Scriptures then unfortunately you are probably going to be disappointed.
However you may find someone who is willing to learn and this I think is the best you can hope for.
Good Luck..
GL
October 15, 2007 at 1:06 pm
GL,
This is both challenging and encouraging.
Thank you for your honesty,
Mick
October 19, 2007 at 9:39 pm
Well Mick, GL, lets look at some facts. Over the last 20 years things have changed for FSU regarding Christian churches. Working with Calvary Chapel Church planting missons, I know of at least 50 or more relatively new legal registered churches that are similar to what we have in America. When attending pastors conferences in 98 and 99 there were over 650 Russian pastors their with their staff who traveled from every part of Russia to get there. I can only imagine that they have grown huge since that time. They put our churches in the USA to shame with their heart felt worship and commitment to God. If you want to see true believers in action, you will find them all over Russia, Ukraine, Belarus, etc. In China the same thing is happening at the rate of over 1 million new believers per day average. So whats wrong with America? The Chinese and Russians are sending their missionaries to the USA. If you want links or addresses just ask.
Michael
October 20, 2007 at 2:57 pm
Michael,
Living in the Bible Belt of America you would presume I may well find a good Christian woman right here. Up till now, this is proving to be much more difficult than anticipated. When I say I’m hunting for a woman who is worthy of me I’m not being arrogant. I have much to offer a woman except the only women who seem to recognize and appreciate these qualities are grandmothers (babushkas adore me). The same toxic atmosphere that is idealized by the feminist movement is polluting the church in America. The true intimacy of worship that was intended for believers has been replaced by masturbatory self gratification. I’ve been attending the same church for 7 years and still no one knows my name. Women don’t know I exist and for that matter don’t care either. This is why I’m searching for a woman outside of this wasteland whose faith has been tested by fire. If you have some links to some information about the church in Russia that would be wonderful.
Thank you,
Mick
October 21, 2007 at 6:20 pm
http://cccpm.org/
Hi Mick, you can start here and take a look around. I have not worked with these people since 99 but Im sure things have not changed much in 8 years. I can reccomend these churches to be what you are looking for.
MOSCOW-locations
CCCPM (1) Bible school and Hqtrs.
Calvary Chapel 1905
Calvary Chapel Kashirskaya
Calvary Chapel Sokol (1)
Calvary Chapel Tushino
Outside Moscow locations-
Calvary Chapel Kirov
Calvary Chapel Nizhniy Novgorod
Calvary Chapel Nizhniy Novgorod(3)locations
Calvary Chapel Novorossiysk
Calvary Chapel Novosibirsk (1)
Calvary Chapel Omsk
Calvary Chapel Ramenskoye (2)
Calvary Chapel Sochi (2)
St. Petersburg
Calvary Chapel Tambov (1)
Calvary Chapel Tver (2)
Calvary Chapel Volgograd (3)
Calvary Chapel Zelenograd
Ukraine-
Odessa – 2 locations
Kiev- 3 locations
Best wishes to you on your quest for truth and genuine love!
Michael
October 21, 2007 at 6:40 pm
I have a question for the Women, or men with same experiences:
This has to do with communication. I’m not sure there is a simple right answer as we are all different. In communicating with Russian women in general I have found that they will spend huge anmounts of time with me in the beginning, like 12 hour days spent together 3 times a week, affectionate and talking about everything, then I won’t hear from them for a week at a time. One example, two weeks went by before she contacted me again. Is this typical that they go days without staying in touch? Are Russian women always this independant?
I know we are all busy in life, but it seems strange to me to go so long without a call or email. Especially when they tell me “all is well in the relationship”.
Cheers, Michael
November 2, 2007 at 5:46 am
Re communication:
http://russianwomenspeak.wordpress.com/2006/09/30/web-dating-russian-girls-lost-or-not-why/
This post was mainly about online communications, but thanks to Michael’s question I completed it into a wider picture.
Re weight:
Generation by generation, Russian women’s (as well as men’s) frames become more asthenic. One usually looks like parent’s “design” stretched up, even if of same height. Thinner bones, thinner muscle, thinner and softer fat tissue, as compared to more “solid” bods of the past. Sometimes weight just doesn’t stick, sometimes this constitution demands exercise and diet to look slim. Pregnancy has lesser impact on body mass than earlier, too. Must be something hormonal.
Also, it’s in the last decades that people assumed the modern culture of fitness and started turning backs to the multi-storey, heavily-composed national meals that the older generation used to concoct, with much taste-checking along the process. 😉 A contemporary woman would rather throw in something light and run, run, run errands in the accelerating tempo.
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
November 3, 2007 at 3:46 pm
Excuse me… Please don’t laugh… I have one burning question. From all the films I’ve watched, I started noticing that American women always wear bras WHILE having sex. Is it some sort of censorship in the movie industry, or else – DO THEY? WHY??
November 3, 2007 at 5:15 pm
My favorite Aunt Natalia, it’s censorship in the movie industry. By keeping the bra on, kids 14 years old can watch the movie without a parent present. Otherwise, if the bra was off, you couldn’t see the movie alone until you’re 18.
November 3, 2007 at 7:10 pm
Natalia, Privet! Spacibo,, I’ve read your answer in depth and it is excellent. Thanks for using my question as an example.
6 days later I did get an email and phone call from Tatiana. She was honest and told me she has spent some time away thinking about us. Her conclusion was simple. She said, you did nothing wrong, you did everything right, and she thought I was her kind of man, she felt chemistry in the beginning, she doesn’t feel enough sparks to start a fire now. We shouldn’t continue dating. She wants to be available for other men. I can only assume she has another man already intersted in her. She said no, she has no one and she is lonely.
I have let her go. I concluded she is not ready for a serious relatonship. She tells me I was her first man since her divorce one year ago. I saw things in her that showed me she is very loving and affectionate but needs more time to heal from her divorce. I wish her the best. Now I am free to move on. She sent me one more email since then.
I get the feeling I will not hear from her again.
My next question, is it typical that once a RW has ended a relationship such as this, that you can remain friends? Second question: Why is it that some RW can not accept that a man can really love her? Read on.
Tanya was asking if she could give my phone number to her best friend Lena to date me. I found this strange. Lena has met me and askes Tanya about me often, we’ve had drinks together once and thats it.
Tanya also invited me to come have drinks with her and Lena after we broke up. I found this strange. She also offerd at the end of the phone call,, “if you get lonely, and need “it” call me, I get lonely too and miss your affection” which totally caught me off guard. She breaks up with me, then invites me back for drinks, sex, then offers my number to her best friend. Why break up if she is lonley and still wants sex? Why offer my number to her friend? I don’t get it. So I told her no, please don’t give out my phone number. I need some time to heal. She says: I didn’t think you were so in love with me. You are handsome guy, you have money, you can have any woman. I said: maybe so, but I want you, I don’t want just any woman. We talked a while longer like we were best friends. She said: I was so afraid you would be angry with me, and you are not, that’s so sweet. This is why it took a week to talk to me,, fear of anger? I never show anger. I was told to cut off all contact with her, But I still think about her. Until this phone call everything was perfect, so I thought.
November 3, 2007 at 8:32 pm
My ex-girlfriend loved sex, but she didn’t like to take off her shirt when she was on top. In fact, even though we had a very active sex life, she didn’t let me see her completely naked very often. I apologize if that was too much information for you 😆
November 3, 2007 at 8:36 pm
P.S. As for why American women are such prudes, even with their lovers, I have no idea what to tell you. But I gave up trying to understand women a long time age 😆
November 3, 2007 at 8:37 pm
P.S. As for why American women are such prudes, even with their lovers, I have no idea what to tell you. But I gave up trying to understand women a long time age 😆
November 3, 2007 at 8:38 pm
I mean, “long time AGO”.
November 3, 2007 at 9:31 pm
Call me “old fashioned” but isn’t fornication a sin?
November 3, 2007 at 11:25 pm
Thanks for the briefing! Having odd pieces of garment on is sexy, but those moviemakers are hypocrites. )
Michael:
“She wants to be available for other men. I can only assume she has another man already intersted in her. She said no, she has no one and she is lonely.”
This may be true, and may be also “diplomacy standard” meant to spare your feelings. I know, it may hurt more to know she’s going AWAY FROM you, not TO a different man. But some women try to prevent the throes of jealousy in the first place.
She “doesn’t feel enough sparks” yet she offers sex.
She may be devastated emotionally, but still hungry sexually; may long for company, yet be unable to return deep feelings, and somewhat phobic / faithless of commitment since surviving a breakup. Beyond own experience, we are bombarded with examples that make a fast-in-love, not-sex-wise-only man seem something unbelievable.
“is it typical that once a RW has ended a relationship such as this, that you can remain friends?”
This may be plain courtesy of guilty conscience, or a belief that such friendship is possible, – a widespread belief, however naive it may turn out.
Tanya was asking if she could give my phone number to her best friend Lena to date me. I found this strange.
Guilt, guilt, and a desire to help her friend find a good man. Consider it an indirect compliment.
May be this way, may be some strings attached.
Anyway, this is her problem, not yours. Whatever comes out of it, “things that didn’t kill us make us stronger.” And as a Russian poet said, “Don’t say in woe, “They are no more”, but say with gratitude – “They have been”.”
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
P.S. Mick, ethics are a bit less theosophical and more situational over here…
November 3, 2007 at 11:58 pm
Re perception of foreigners.
…Younger Russian women’s parents are modern-minded enough to be free of ideological brainwash. They may be critical of politicians and mass culture, but treat each individual individually.)) Older Russian women are more likely to be independent on their parents, if alive.
…There are some xenophobes locally, prevalently among male population. Some blokes make it violent on the racial basis (huh, assaulting a “WASP” evidently seems too risky to them.) Women are, for the most part, same-race-selective, but quite a number of them is tolerant, or even hae-te-ro-chro-mo-philic (broke my fingers spelling! – meaning, excited with the exotic type, especially Latin).
…The prevailing vision of foreign countries and particularly America is: “an orderly, stable, clean, respectful and well-equipped environment where men are reliable, women are protected, and children have prospects”. Lacking knowledge of local problems, particularly ignorant of “militant feminism”, it’s hard to believe why an accomplished man won’t find a wife in his own country. And blaming fellow women can be perceived as irresponsible and misogynistic, so it takes man much caution and outside proof to explain a Russian woman what’s wrong back home. Luckily or not, we believe in the “published word”.
Sinc., N.
November 4, 2007 at 12:08 am
(corrections:
* not-sex-wise-only = needing more than sex
* love of different color = not necessarily Latin)
November 4, 2007 at 3:06 am
Natalia, thank you for your answers.
My heart is doing fine.
On the phone that night after expressing her desire to date other men, she asked if I would be jealous if she was with someone new. I said no, not after you just ended it with me. We both have the freedom to move on. She sounded surprised. I said my love for you is not selfish. More than anything, I want to see you happy. She has the most beautiful smile. She was speechless.
Why ask if I will be jealous? If it’s over, why be concerned about my emotions, unless she still has feelings?
It seems she is trying to hold on and keep me around as a back up plan incase new guy doesn’t work out. My guess, she had her eyes on someone and was ready to make a move, I was in the way of her freedom. So she did the right thing and told me she had lost the chemistry. I have a feeling she was talking to someone in the last 2 weeks. The daily emails and calls turned into once a week. I asked her, have you been pre occupied with someone? she said no, it’s her job and school and work keeping her so busy, she has to study. Her only class to study is English. The other class is belly dancing and then a tennis class once a week, who is she trying to fool? I told her if Belly dancing and tennis are more important than the man she loves, she better change her priorities. My partner is #1 in my life and I expect to be #1 in hers. If not, she is not worthy of me as her partner. She said nothing.
She said: I have no friends here. Only Lena is my best friend, you are my second good friend, I don’t want to loose our friendship”.
It’s hard to know what’s genuine and what is said out of guilt or trying to be nice or gentle.
Maybe she was afraid it was getting to serious to soon?
She is waiting for me to call her about getting together but I feel it’s not a good idea, So I haven’t. I don’t know if she tried to call since I changed my number. she can still email me but hasn’t.
Misha
November 4, 2007 at 3:36 am
Hi Mick,, I agree with your old fashion ways, and this is why I was so surprised she made the offer. Maybe it was a hint? Now that I think about it, maybe I totally misunderstood her?
We had not had sex yet, although we have been very affectionate. I was her cuddle bear and she loved to touch me and be touched. This offer caught me off guard. Then again, with her English skills, I could easily misunderstand what she was trying to say. She usually askes me if she says the right word for her meaning. For example she used the word massage instead of message. I love to get a massage from you 🙂 she meant message, as in Email message, but she spelled the word massage. she said a few times, I love to get your massages, they make me feel so warm and my heart pounds. I dont remember giving her a massage, she meant email.
So maybe she meant something else, “no reason to be lonely, if you need it, call me”. We talked about being lonely. If you need it call me. Im lonely and I need a friend, could she be so innocent at 37? Either that or it was a hint she wanted more and didnt think I was going to give it. She did say she misses intimacy, this I did not misunderstand.
We are not friends with benefits type people. Anyway, glad to clear that up. Now I need to ask her what she really meant.
November 4, 2007 at 4:05 am
All these guesses, on “multiple choice”, or “being nice and gentle” out of upbringing, or fear of early and perfect togetherness, are reasonable.
She needs a local male friend to rely on, definitely. Selfish? Maybe… I don’t know if she is capable of, and interested in, watching / reading news. If we assume she is, then, if she be a good friend, she should have called at least to know if you are ok (as far as I remember about the disaster).
In her defense I would only say that dropping her job (isn’t she earning a living with belly-dancing? then she ought to work out a lot, so that to be a good teacher and dancer) as well as qualifications that would keep her afloat abroad (ENGLISH – hell it can take the whole week of homework, not one class where you prove what you’ve learned and get another task! – and possibly tennis – if, e.g., she could pursue a trainer’s or a sparring partner’s qualification, and have prepaid her subscription) before a relationship is “guaranteed” by marriage, is too much to ask for, in her situation.
Please understand that we are raised in uncertainty whether the man would always be there for her (even a marriage can break!) – so maintaining her own durability is the same priority as air, water, nutrition. You have to survive before you can care about something or someone else.
We are very cautious about men who demand to sacrifice our interests. Wherever we can, we do, but retaining some part of them is necessary to remain the women you’ve loved us to be. )
So much I can say from across the ocean. You have chance to bring her back by being proud, you have chance to lose her for her being proud, – it’s all up to you, I dare not advise.
Sinc., N.
November 4, 2007 at 4:17 am
If I could say one thing to the rest of the world, it would be this: DO NOT, repeat DO NOT, think that Hollywood tells you anything meaningful about life in America.
These are fantasies produced by a small group of very wealthy people who mostly live in a small rich town in California, and who spend their whole lives talking only to each other. Not to mention dating each other, marrying each other, and divorcing each other. Over and over.
They do not produce documentaries. They produce entertainment and fantasy. Their goal is to make a movie or TV show that is more shocking and provocative than the last one, which pushes the envelope further and further, in order to sell more tickets and make more money. That’s all it’s about.
And yes, they always have to think about what rating a movie is going to receive from the MPAA, which directly affects ticket sales. And this distorts the picture even further.
Their favorite activity is to give each other awards. Which they turn into another TV show, featuring themselves.
Get it?
November 4, 2007 at 4:32 am
🙂
November 4, 2007 at 5:50 am
Natalia, true she should have called, I left messages and she read my emails. There was thick black smoke over all of San Diego. She also had no school that week, everything was closed. She apologised and I forgave. She knows I always forgive, she is always late, not just 10 minutes, but 30 min or one hour late. So I have to forgive often for things.
Her mind is a bit slow sometimes. it takes her a long time to write to me and use dictionary to look up words, so I excuse her for not writing back but she should call. I offered her free cell phone so she doesnt spend her money to call.
This is Tanya’s situation: Her ex divorced her and left her with nothing. She had no place to live and no money so she had to find a job where she could also live. She found this job as a nurse assistant at a elderly care home. The owners are Russian. Her pay is small because she gets a room and food there. She cares for 5 people. works Saturday Sunday and Wednesday. The other days she has off. So she doesnt earn much. She goes to school Monday night at 7 PM, Tuesday is Tennnis during the day, Thursday night is English class at 7 Pm. she has lots of free time.
She just started taking a class in belly dancing mid September, she never dances for money,only for exercise. Tennis has also just started after we met, so she is only a beginner.
On our last date together Tanushka talked with me about wanting to quit her job and start college for Registered Nurse degree. It is very expensive 4 year program. She has now a phlebotomy license, so she can get a new job doing this to cover her bills, but she has no experience so its hard to get a job. We talked about “if things go well between us” could we get an apartment together or she move in with me. So I said sure, I will consider that. Lets see how it goes with us. I told her I would start looking for a place close to her college, She lives 30 miles away from me. I asked her where she wants to live. She said anywhere is fine.
Maybe she feels we are not equal because I have money, she has nothing but debt from student loan. I live in a nice place close to the beach. So this could be a problem for her. I also earn about the same in one week as she earns in 3 months. So she feels awkward about finances. She wants to contribute, but I say no, wait till she is done with school in 4 years, and working as a Nurse. I would even give her allowance of 250 per week to use as she needs. She said nothing more about this for 6 days, through the fires and everything. So then I get that email and call. I’m thinking she is crazy to reject my offers. Most women would jump on it.
She made a point to say, she want to be equal in the relationship, What exactly does this mean? equal love? equal partner? equal everything? like enjoy all the same things? Pay half of the bills? I don’t know. Im thinking she was overwhelmed with everything.
November 4, 2007 at 1:33 pm
Hi Michael,
please excuse my misinterpretation! ) Too much sleepless time over the Web. ))
Some more lecturing on Russian culture ))
By being equal, a Russian woman defines a relationship where she is not perceived as an inferior, looked down upon, or condescended to. She needs that, in decisionmaking, her opinion should be considered of equal importance, that her needs receive equal attention, that her man respects her as much as she respects him.
This all can be difficult, if she is behind him in terms of wealth and even language, and the more so if she owes him something. It takes a special man to be so generous as to neglect social difference, to value the subtler things she can give him, to perceive his own good actions as a reward in itself – and a woman’s independence helps a lot in meeting such men or making men such. Fact.
Being experienced in life – and in a sad way, – she is more proud and detached than gullible (not in the pejorative sence, – inclined to believe that she’s possibly met such a man).
To a Russian woman, it’s important to know you know she’s not “selling herself”, nor “using you”, if she accepts your help; that she has not “hung herself at your neck”, has not “agreed too soon” to be yours.
Traditional etiquette implies that, accepting your gifts, she accepts your feelings. A favorite quote among Russian women is “We become forever responsible for ones we have tamed”. Thus, till she is not sure she can devote all of herself, she is cautious at the receiving end. Because the giver is growing hopes and feelings.
You can always contact me for personal consulting.
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
November 4, 2007 at 1:37 pm
Hi Michael,
sorry for misinterpretation. ) Too much sleepless time over the Web.))
Wrote you a vast comment on Russian women’s understanding of equal relationship and behaviors that it implies, but the site gulped it. Let’s see if it comes afloat.
Sinc., N.
November 4, 2007 at 2:26 pm
“Mick Says:
November 3, 2007 at 9:31 pm
Call me “old fashioned” but isn’t fornication a sin?”
Yes, it is. But who hasn’t made mistakes in their past? I should have mentioned before that I’ve sworn off premarital sex. If anyone here thought that I was trying to encourage sinful behavior, then let me say emphatically that that wasn’t my intention at all.
November 4, 2007 at 2:30 pm
P.S. Mick, great post about the state of our churches. I agree wholeheartedly and I’ve had the same experiences as you have.
November 4, 2007 at 2:45 pm
Natalia,
Please interpret: “ethics are a bit less theosophical and more situational over here…”
-Mick
November 4, 2007 at 5:55 pm
Mick,
Because I know some are believers here.
We all struggle with intimacy issues in relationships. I was lucky with Tanya, that we didn’t get that far. There wasn’t that hormonal bond between us yet and made breaking up easier.
This is mostly because of lessons learned with Nadya. Nadya and I both agree to this day, if we had not slept together we would still be together. This isn’t to say it was a bad physical experience, but it became a bad spiritual and emotional one for 3 months afterwards. I won’t go into deatails here. It was a choice of putting God first in the relationship.
November 4, 2007 at 10:21 pm
Mick:
First, I’m sorry for a slip of tongue: I meant “theological”, and not related to Blavatskaya’s “theosophy”… Nata needs a rest ))
I meant, that in making decisions and evaluating behaviors, most people of Russian / Ukrainian culture would reckon by general principles (basically “the Golden Rule”, “Judge Not, that ye be not judged”, national customs and proverbs, including “God sees everything” and “listen to your heart” because “God is in everyone’s heart”) yet consider all specific circumstances of a given situation, – rather than dig into the letter of religious norms and their interpretations.
Ironically, “Orthodox” as a confession (Russian term literally sounds “Right-Worshipping”) is not literally “orthodox” (“pedantic” if translated as “ortodoksalny”). If you once in a while find someone on a Ru-net forum not related to a religious site, who quotes the Scriptures like a lawyer, that’s probably a priest or a so-called “fanatic”.
(All this is said in the local context, without any intention to slight Western believers.)
Though in trouble or remorse, a typical Russian / Ukrainian is likely to go to church for prayer, or (in toughest situations) for confession and advice. Even criminals do. )
Below is a post with some more reference on local religious views.
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
November 5, 2007 at 12:07 am
Ouch, doesn’t link.
http://russianwomenspeak.wordpress.com/2006/12/06/russian-women-atheist-religious-christian-orthodox-spiritual-heretical-or-what/
This site doesn’t like me )) probably too much of one woman recently )
November 5, 2007 at 9:01 pm
Natalia wrote: Michael, Wrote you a vast comment on Russian women’s understanding of equal relationship and behaviors that it implies, but the site gulped it. Let’s see if it comes afloat.
Sinc., N.
Can you link me to this? Spacibo,
Misha
November 5, 2007 at 9:16 pm
Micheal she meant this comment.
November 6, 2007 at 3:55 am
Craig Says:
November 4, 2007 at 4:17 am
“If I could say one thing to the rest of the world, it would be this: DO NOT, repeat DO NOT, think that Hollywood tells you anything meaningful about life in America.”
Have to agree with you Craig; seems to me, values of Americans have nosedived with the advent of television and movies from Hollywood. There’s never any ounce of truth that one can learn from TV shows or movies. All I see are lies and misrepresentation of reality. I don’t have TV or cable. And I don’t miss the propagandas.
So, the feminists plan is the get all women in the workforce and let the tv babysit youngsters. So what sort of values do these young people grow up with? Hollywood values.
-M
November 6, 2007 at 3:52 pm
Natalia,
Theologically speaking, if I was to ask a Russian woman to stop lusting after me and use Scripture as my authority stating Jesus said adultery starts in the heart, would I be viewed as a judgmental fanatic?
However, situationally speaking, if I was to ask a Russian woman to stop lusting after me because she was ugly and I wasn’t attracted to her, would she be more understanding?
What if I was attracted to her? Do unto others as you would have them do unto you… right?
Am I understanding you correctly?
-Mick
November 6, 2007 at 7:01 pm
I love case studies and quote-fencing… ))
Russian women know 1001 way to say “no” to a man without hurting him. There must be as many escapes from a woman.
If I understand the situation correctly, she is married? It’s quite possible and doubtlessly correct to explain her that you are not a man who supports adultery, – even without a need to appeal to higher authorities. ))
Nevertheless, many wordings, parables and images from the Bible became common cultural heritage here as well. Even a secular may use them easily, looking educated, well-humored and moral yet not a “fanatic”. But if you want to cut her off permanently, add some righteous flame into your eyes and sternity into your voice )
November 6, 2007 at 7:15 pm
Catching up with the Hollywood discussion… The FSU folks are pretty understanding, “This is just a movie!” – though quoting films to illustrate some idea is close to a national sport. (People need “common background” for humor and community.) BTW, as for humor, I laughed more at “My Super Ex” due to some briefing on feminism. )
What I meant by “printed word”, is journalism, even Live Journal ))
November 6, 2007 at 10:45 pm
Natalia,
There is no “situation”. I already know the answer (I have all the answers).
It is a hypothetical demonstration of the dangers of looking into ourselves to establish righteousness and truth.
“If truth is relative, then no one is ever wrong—even when they are. As long as something is true to me, then I’m right even when I’m wrong. The drawback is that I could never learn anything either, because learning is moving from a false belief to a true one—that is, from an absolutely false belief to an absolutely true one. The truth is that absolutes are inescapable.”
-Mick
November 7, 2007 at 12:31 am
Hi GL,
I’ve been a reader (lurker) on your and Natalia’s blogs for a while, but haven’t had much to contribute. I came upon this article today and it made just too much sense and was too on-point not to pass along.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/femail/article.html?in_article_id=491929&in_page_id=1879
I have discussions with my friends (I am in my late 20s) about this subject quite often, and very often they resign themselves that they will have to compromise (read: ‘lose’) much of their sex life when they marry or commit. They are often critical, disbelieving, and sometimes even hostile to the idea that there are millions of women out there that are willing to be balanced partners in a relationship.
The more I learn of the FSU womens’ paragidm and soul, the more I am convinced I must never ‘settle’ for less someone willing to put as much love and care into all aspects of relationship as I am.
Much thanks to you all for providing a forum where intelligent debate is welcomed and irrational flaming is ignored.
Sincerely,
Orn
November 8, 2007 at 10:41 pm
Orn,
Good article. And I read this sentence in disbelief. I thought everyone knows that a man has needs!! Really what were these girls thinking.
“She confessed that during the three years before he had strayed, they’d had virtually no sex – on average once every six months. Because she had thrown herself into establishing her company, Jennifer had been working terribly hard and had shown little interest in sex.”
“It never occurred to Jennifer – or the countless other women I have dealt with on this exact same issue – that eventually he’d look elsewhere.”
So, let the fembots run the world then you and I and any man can head East to find real and natural girls who understand that relationships is for intimacy and good love making.
Really I ask, “Why eat saw dust when you can have Tiramisu?”
Save your pretty pennies, then head East is my advice. Leave the fembots to their careers which can never satisfy them like a hungry man can.
-M
November 9, 2007 at 2:03 am
Even if I was a machine I might only spend a month of my life having sex (after marriage of course). Lord willing if I live to be 75 that’s 0.1% of my time here on earth. If I marry a woman who I can’t connect with linguistically, spiritually, industriously, morally and geographically, what are we going to do with the other 99.9% of awkward silence? Is there more to Russian women than just great sex, beauty and charm?
-Mick
November 9, 2007 at 4:43 am
Mick,
There is much to the Russian woman than sex, beauty and charm. Those are just some of the results of a completely different outlook on life. The charm especially is a symptom of intelligence, self-confidence and comfort in being themselves.
The problem is that if it’s only .1% of your time, and it proportionally means a lot more (to most men), then why should it be so difficult for your woman to want you to enjoy that .1%?
I am coming from the position that any woman I am with, I will treat very well, but fairly. I am willing to do many things to make her happy, and I deserve the same. It should not be a huge sacrifice for a woman to want to do something that takes so little time, but means so much to her husband.
On the matter of time: 1 month is only 720 hours. You would use that up in 10 years if you had sex for 20 minutes a day (on average). .1% seems a bit low for many men. I am planning on being with my wife a lot more than 10 years 😉
Also, if that small amount of time spent in bed is ignored or skipped unilaterally, it can have enormous effects on the rest of your relationship, which I think was the point of the story.
-orn
November 9, 2007 at 4:45 am
Oops! bad math – I meant every OTHER day.
November 9, 2007 at 1:50 pm
Orn,
If I doubled, tripled or quadrupled this time, the result doesn’t change much at all (0.2%, 0.3%, 0.4%) and in the case of a legend like yourself the product may be as high as 1%. 99% is still a very high percentage of time to fill doing other things other than doing “it”.
With this being said I think you made a very good point:
“It should not be a huge sacrifice for a woman to want to do something that takes so little time, but means so much to her husband.”
-Mick
November 11, 2007 at 3:25 pm
The moral of the story is: Sex is not as vital as most men make out and more vital than most women make out.
The disclaimer that comes with a woman should read: If you have an erection lasting longer than 720 hours… you’re welcome.
November 11, 2007 at 9:57 pm
Well put!
November 14, 2007 at 6:31 pm
GL, I have a burning question. And I’m going to put it in boldface because it’s real important:
I was finally able to get those guys at antimisandry.com to give more than 4 piddly little responses to your Open Letter to the Men’s Movement. I had to prod them multiple times, but they finally they had a substantial meaningful discussion about it and came up with a substantial number of points for you and questions for you.
You should read the thread you started where the discussion / questions are: http://antimisandry.com/russian_women_open_letter_mens_movement-t1550.html
And probably the best thing to do would be to make some kind of a response back to them on the forum.
November 15, 2007 at 11:50 am
“The disclaimer that comes with a woman should read: If you have an erection lasting longer than 720 hours… you’re welcome.”
Mick can you explain this
November 15, 2007 at 8:04 pm
Mansman,
Do you want me to start from the beginning?
-Mick
November 15, 2007 at 10:57 pm
Upon the article…
Wow. Apparently feminism became the banning banner of the frigid! Or else? Science and culture proved that women can find same if not stronger pleasure in sex as men can, at least on conditions of love, compatibility, reliability (commitment) and long-time joint experience, all this normally associated with marriage. Equality gave women a right to initiate sex and to take a part in making it better. The Pill relieved them from the risks of extra pregnancies. A favorite occupation gives a person energy and refreshment that overwhelm into the bedroom, and offers the whole spectrum of additional impulses for intimacy with your partner, – from highs of victories, to times when you seek recreation and consolation in the arms of your dearest nearest.
Open a Russian “Cosmopolitan” or any site “for women” on the Runet, and the main issue in the “it” section would be, “How to arouse a man”! Next, how to please Him, how to improve what displeases Her, and how to find more space and energy for The Two.
With all this intensity, “it” is indeed 0.** % of what our girls are made of, made of. Mental and emotional connection, humor, recognizing / sharing / weaving common cultural background in the abundance of its heritage and subtlety of shades, is their most essential need in a relationship, plus other criteria excellently pointed out by Mick. They are so important that they can stir up or even, conversely, override the “chemistry” and libido.
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
November 19, 2007 at 3:21 am
Mansman,
Forgive me for being crass. The comment was a spin on the commercials for Viagra and Cialis that I see all too often when I watch television (and I don’t even watch very much). There is a disclaimer the narrator reads at the end stating: If you have an erection lasting longer than 4 hours please call your physician. It’s salesmanship at its lowest. Remember: Sexuality Sells Products and with the abundance of sexuality that is thrown in our faces continually it’s like having a million dollars in the bank and not being able to make a withdrawal. I would much rather be a poor man (married to one woman) and have access to the funds (actually have sex with the woman I love).
-Mick
November 19, 2007 at 3:03 pm
Hence the comment: “The disclaimer that comes with a woman should read: If you have an erection lasting longer than 720 hours… you’re welcome.”
November 19, 2007 at 5:41 pm
Ok here is the burning question of the day. Natalia, HELP!! Is your site up and running yet? Can I hire your services to help me find a real Russian woman?
I decided not to look for one that has been born again in America. These who I have dated here have lost their RW values and charm and relpaced it with AW attitudes. The worst thing I heard from Nadya, is how she said “I am American woman now” It made me sick to hear this. She meant she was a US citizen now, but I knew it also meant she was exercising her new freedom to be American feminist.
November 19, 2007 at 5:52 pm
About 3 months ago I met Lana, she just got here from Russia, she is 27 and was moving into her apartment and starting a 12 month internship here. I was moving out of my apartment so I gave her a new Bed, sheets, pillows,some furniture, computer desk etc. She was so grateful, gave me a big hug and kiss and asked what she could do for me? I told her fine me a good Russian wife to marry. I shared my experience with RW here in US. She said stop dating old RW, you need young wife! I asked her, what young beauty like yourself is going to date an older man like me? She said lots of us will, you are handsome man. You are so generous. It would take me months to afford the gifts you freely gave to me today, You can have young wife. who cares about age? It’s the person that matters. She met with me 3 times to load and haul the furniture to her new place.
This girl was a life guard at some resort in Russia, perfect 10 looks and body with a heart of gold to match, but would she really date a guy like me when she can have a guy 20 years younger? We exchanged phone numbers but, havent heard from her again.
😦
November 19, 2007 at 5:56 pm
Michael,
Would you really want a girl who could be bought by cast-off furniture? Sounds a bit icky to me.
VG
November 19, 2007 at 9:15 pm
VisitingGirl: You have a unique ability to reduce any virtue like random acts of kindness, to crassitude.
Actually, I take that back. It’s a common ability you share with most of your modern/western women.
Having said that… Michael: Relationships 101: Don’t lead with the cash.
November 19, 2007 at 9:44 pm
Socon, that insult was a bit mean, given that you actually agree with me!
November 20, 2007 at 12:00 am
VisitingGirl it is your GenX facetiousness that tires me. It has become rather old.
November 20, 2007 at 12:47 am
VisitingGirl,,
Michael clears his throat:
The furniture was brand new and worth over 30,000 Rubles, which in some places in Russia and Ukraine will buy a whole flat or house. I never had met the girl before that day. The woman moving into my apartment asked me what my plans were with these specific pieces as I was moving out. I asked why and in walks Lana, who was helping her move in.
How many men would hand a total stranger this value as a gift? Random acts of kindness still exist where I come from.
I also gave away a new micro wave oven, a Bakers rack and a few other pieces to this woman who was moving in. She did me a huge favor saving me thousands by taking over my lease that I was breaking.
Michael
November 20, 2007 at 12:59 am
socon,
I learned that lesson well.
November 20, 2007 at 5:08 am
Socon — As RW has taught me, I will hear your rudeness and simply smile an enigmatic smile.
Michael — From the above post, and also from many others on this site, you seem like a lovely, genuine, generous man. In part due to these qualities, you also seem like a man who could be taken for a ride by an unscrupulous woman. I wish you all luck in finding the woman you deserve, and please take care.
November 21, 2007 at 2:08 am
“I decided not to look for one that has been born again in America. These who I have dated here have lost their RW values and charm and replaced it with AW attitudes.”
Hey Michael,
I recall you prodded me to go for Russians here in the states. You caught on pretty quick on why I prefer to look in their native land where they grew up and are imbued with true Russian culture and values. Of course people can still change pretty quick; sad but I hope that won’t happen to the girl I plan to marry. Anyhow, the bigger issue is, how about the children and the next generation. How to shield them from these grotesque feminist ideologies and attitudes? I’m thinking of shipping them to their gramps in Russia then they can come back later in their adult years… LOL
!!! Feminism sucks major !!!
-M
November 21, 2007 at 2:10 am
Searching for my Russian Heart of Gold. Enjoy guys!!
-M
November 21, 2007 at 2:44 am
Hey Michael,
Remember the Russian saying Man falls in love with their eyes and woman falls in love with their ears.
So, really maybe it matters somewhat but not to as great as an extent as to how you can speak to them. If you know how to talk… that’s the secret of it. Matters little how much money or how good looking. In fact, the money part of it could work to your disadvantage because that will attract the gold diggers.
Anyhow, just to boost your confidence, you can follow the advice of this book… Check it out…
The Perricone Promise: Look Younger, Live Longer in Three Easy Steps
-M
November 21, 2007 at 11:05 am
Here is a question GL,
How to prevent Russians coming over from being Ameri-feminismized?
-M
November 21, 2007 at 12:26 pm
Hi Monoah,
I think that’s like asking how can you prevent your kids from having the wrong influences in their lives.. They either have the traditional ways deep in their lives or they don’t. Or more critically they either embrace their traditional identity as women or wish to try to become something else. This is an issue of Free Will which we all have and trying to “prevent” that is probabaly the wrong approach.. Trying to provide value to them so that they build a future with you just as eagerly as you want to build one with them is probably the better mentality to have. Hope this helps..
GL
November 21, 2007 at 4:46 pm
Where can I go to find russian women who speak good english? are they only to be found in the cities, which i would like to avoid
November 21, 2007 at 5:01 pm
Mansman… excellent point.
I think we should all start learning Russian 🙂
November 21, 2007 at 8:55 pm
GL,there is another problem.
There is a Russian woman on our http://www.mens-rights.net/forum board and she is the worst feminist we have ever had on that board.
She manipulated the board owner into thinking that she is good, but the truth is that she is a manipulative, lying feminist. She constantly says feminist stuff about men and picks fights with the board members. But she smooth talks and manipulates the board owner so everybody knows she is bad except for the board owner.
So I guess I’m asking what do we do?
November 21, 2007 at 11:18 pm
Well, I’m sure Luke doesn’t want my opinion on the matter, but I’ll give it anyway…
I read some of the posts on that forum, and that woman’s blog (elfprincess). I found her to be for the most part very reasonable, and anti-feminist.
Admittedly she does get a bit crass on the forum at times, but then hanging out with MascoNazi man and his cohorts tends to bring out the worst in people. Doesn’t make them feminists.
November 22, 2007 at 12:07 am
I have read Elfprincess, she is highly educated (trauma surgeon) very intellegent communicater. She is anti-femi. Those guys like to nit pick her comments. I’ll bite my tongue, again we are OFF TOPIC!…but not all women are femi’s.
November 22, 2007 at 5:41 am
Socon
English must be the language of the marriage. A man must be able to lead his wife, and he should be her teacher, not the other way around.
November 22, 2007 at 12:52 pm
No Socon, I didn’t ask for your opinion.
Anyone who claims to be an anti-feminist is automatically an anti-feminist? That is just plain wrong.
Listen, even if you hate Masculist Man for whatever reason, DCM has said nothing but rational arguments and yet your friend Elf Entitlement Princess pulls out all the same feminist cards on DCM as she does on Masculist Man: the “woman-hater” card, the “you want to beat women” card, etc., etc., etc. She’s used these feminist cards in her deck to try to skewer DCM who is trying to have a rational discussion.
Folks, she’s a feminist.
I was trying to ask GL’s opinion to see if GL knew any tricks for when Russian women go bad, because we could have used them.
Specifically we want to know how to snap our board administrator out of her “invisible power” which she is using against him. GL knows about that sort of stuff. He writes posts about Russian women’s “invisible power”.
So I thought maybe he knows how to shut it off.
November 22, 2007 at 4:56 pm
Luke, I can’t believe that I’m even answering you. But, this is so beyond stupid that I had to point it out.
Emasculated man is an interesting phycological subject. Any one saying “woman hater”, and “you want to beat women” about him has a 99% chance of being right. And, your self apointed leader of the MRA seems only hell bent on alienating everyone around him with his bad language, mean spirited comments, and his claims (like yours) that everyone that disagrees with you is a feminist.
DCM I still have to read more on to form an opinion.
As for elf princess, I have read a bunch of her posts, and she seems very sane and reasonable person, but I have asid this before, and will say again, it’s not really about equal rights. Women and men are different, and so, consequently, they both should have different rights, priveleges, and obligations that are best suited to their gender.
By looking at you, Luke, and Emask man, I see that you want the women to have no rights whatsoever, and no priviliges, while having all the obligations, and you want all the rights and privlieges, while having none of the obligations. I will in no way say that feminists haven’t had the exact reversal of this, but does one need to be so extreem to the other end?? Especially to women that haven’t done anythign to you personally. (I still believe that my shunned in Poland comment stands)
Just in case you try to twist my words, it’s a woman’s right to be protected by her man, and her obligation is to stand by him and love him with all her being. It’s also her privilege for her to have a man open the door for her when going someplace.
November 22, 2007 at 5:44 pm
Wolverine,
Can you give a bit more detail on the different rights, privileges and obligations you advocate? I’m interested, and I imagine there are more than the ones you summarise in your post?
If you want to point me to somewhere else you’ve explained it rather than derail the thread that’s fine.
VG
November 22, 2007 at 6:26 pm
Mansman…
I agree with you wrt the male taking the lead in the relationship, but you can still learn Russian first, and then teach her English 🙂
Also, one shouldn’t fall into the trap of totally rejecting your girl’s culture, language, etc. [I believe this happens somewhat often.] Her culture is a big part of what made her who she is
—
Luke…
Try kryptonite.
😆
—
VisitingGirl…
Here are some of mine:
Man: [1] To provide for her material needs to the best of his ability.
[2] To protect her & their children from external dangers… physical, emotional, ideological…
Woman: [1] To support him in his decisions and endeavours, & follow his lead so long as he is ethical and acting in the best interests of the family.
[2] To accept her role as being ideally that of a full-time homemaker and mother [unless mutually agreed upon to the contrary in the establishment phase of the relationship.]
Both: [1] To make a concerted effort to adopt a pleasant, affectionate, and respectful disposition towards one another.
[2] Commitment towards making the marriage work for better or worse and regarding divorce as not being an option except under the most extreme of circumstances.
[3] Absolute sexual fidelity.
[4] Regard their relationship with one and other (& later the kids) as the most important in their lives, and structure other relationships and undertakings around this rather than vice versa.
November 22, 2007 at 7:59 pm
VisitingGirl, please see above post addressed to you by socon. When my brain is a little less mushy, I’ll write a post for you. (Insomnia really sucks). I had written a more detailed post on Luke’s blog right after he started the prostitute rant, but as I have sworn off of ever returning there, I’ll let you sift through all that garbage if you want to see it.
Socon, with your Superman references, and Luke’s Star Wars references, how many movie references will we be getting here??? :D:D:P:P
November 22, 2007 at 9:36 pm
“DCM I still have to read more on to form an opinion.”
Well then you’d better read up man, because that’s who she’s been assailing mercilessly with the cards in the classic feminist deck when he’s done nothing but make logical and rational arguments.
The point that I was making is even if you hate Masc and me, that still doesn’t explain DCM, and it still doesn’t explain why she’s pulling out all those feminist cards on DCM.
November 23, 2007 at 12:05 am
Well anyway, as of right now the situation is pretty much settled because we have some of the toughest MRA’s in the entire MRM on the case: (DCM, Masc, me, Bob Allen, and Raider67).
Now I see that since we got Bob in there in addition to everyone else, we’ve been able to get that feminazi bitch under control.
But still it would really be the icing on the cake if we could get GL to tell us how to shut off her Russian woman invisible power.
November 23, 2007 at 3:06 am
Elfprincess does not need to be “controlled”. She is not a faminazi bit*& and her screen name is not Elf cu*t. She has provided rational arguments on her own, without the use of “invisible power”. She is a traditional Russian woman in a traditional relationship the kind we’ve been looking for through this blog.
further use of degrading lables does little for a rational argument. maybe GL could tell us how to shut that off.
November 23, 2007 at 6:11 am
“further use of degrading lables does little for a rational argument. maybe GL could tell us how to shut that off.”
Ceiver, I wish he would, because Elfprincess the ‘traditional Russian woman’ has been firing off degrading labels at DCM and others for no good reason for the past few weeks now.
Anyway, I came here to ask a question to someone who is knowledgable on the subject.
Now here it is: If there’s a guy that’s been jaded by Russian women’s invisible power, then how do we un-jade that guy?
That’s all I’m asking. I didn’t ask to deal with the self-appointed thought police here, so I’m not going to.
I’ve given the background information, (probably even a little bit more than I needed to). I’ve asked the question. Now GL or whoever else is an expert on this can take it or leave it.
November 23, 2007 at 7:50 am
If there’s a guy that’s been jaded by Russian women’s invisible power, then how do we un-jade that guy?
Well, first you need two eye of newt, four crows eggs that are a week from hatching, blood of an aligator, holy water, and a big boiling couldron….
Seriously, your boy has to want to be unjaded. People form an opinion of someone very early after meeting them, and unless the other person does something catastrophic, their opinion has very little chance of changing.
That being said, I don’t thing that Elfprincess is a feminist. All her posts seem very reasonable to me, but perhaps you take some of what she says too literally. She does play devil’s advocate in some of her posts, and it seems to be a game they like to play. I wouldn’t worry about it. If she is one, time will cause her to show more definately that a thousand rants.
A girl that is even somewhat feminine is powerful, Luke. Even a girl that follows the Rules is very powerful. Elfprincess seems to be more truly feminine that most women I know. That makes her extremely powerful, and her spell will be almost impossible to break.
November 23, 2007 at 11:21 am
Wolverine
is that what they make vodka with?
November 23, 2007 at 3:06 pm
Regarding the rights and obligations of Socon/Wolverine above:
There is a lot I can agree with there. One question — how do you resolve obligation (1) of the woman (let the husband lead) with the idea that ‘A man is the head, but the woman is the neck that turns the head’? I am really unclear on what either of these guidelines actually means in practice. They seem a bit contradictory (?)
VG
November 23, 2007 at 5:41 pm
Lol Wolverine. My favourite is Fight Club. Kinda resonates with me 🙂
—
VisitingGirl… some examples…
“A man is strong enough to protect me from animals and even other people. I may not be as physically strong as him. I am not able to lift heavy things like he can, nor do I have the strength to fight wars like him. However, there is one person I will do my hardest to protect him from. Himself. I was built to not only nurture his children, but also him.” (Zoey)
“It is difficult, very difficult. It takes every ounce of concentration and strength. It makes you wake up to reality. It clarifies your mind to your own faults and energizes you to do everything in your power to better your partner in the most quiet almost unnoticeable, behind the scenes ways.” (Doamna)
Of course these only work in the context of a totally committed, exclusive, mature, and mutually loving relationship [ie. one that fulfils the criteria of the laundry list I wrote in #98 above.]
My opinion of course. Others may feel differently.
November 23, 2007 at 7:13 pm
And with that piece of (pseudo) wisdom, I announce that I will be scarce for awhile.
I will, however, be back to clutter this fine blog with my irrelevant rantings 🙂
November 23, 2007 at 8:44 pm
Wolverine
is that what they make vodka with?
Who knows the secret of the great vodka?? If they do, I’m sure they chant a spell over it too. 😀
November 23, 2007 at 8:46 pm
Haall-lo, what’s happening? 😉
Manoah,
“sending children back to gramps”, parting them from parents and advanced opportunities would be cruelly unjust. Why not relocate the gramps?! Family united, communication continued, “strangecare” avoided.
Michael,
relax – no one was going to be “bought” with the furniture. ) By a Russian pragmatic gauge, you were conceivably reasonable not bothering to sell it or move an old filling to a new place, only to replace it. But the Russian culture makes one sincerely grateful for the good. And part of this attitude is Readiness to Return Good Actions. “I rub your back and you rub mine”, in a chain of useful acquaintances and services they can provide, this is how the Russian society goes round.
As for the age gap, seems that you can indeed look within a bit bolder brackets. Youthful physique, good attitude and financial stability do make a 10-year and sometimes even 20-year difference no problem, if love is there. (Articulateness is a vital asset, too, but so many Russian men are good at lip-service and smooth talk… only; it is discernible, and tiring.) Much has been written on the age issue, and more would. Just watch out for manipulators who could doubtlessly “do better”.
The launch of our business is taking more time than expected, – it needs to be fully legitimate and hi-tech. But everything will be allright. I can’t promise you a Russian wife, – we are starting from Ukraine. This is a no worse deal, if not a better one. ))
Gentlemen,
whatever country of residence, English would be the language of the marriage, first of all for the reason that her English would anyway come sooner and better than your Russian. English is easier by nature; she probably starts learning it at earlier age (thus granted a more intensive learning capacity); and linguistics are physiologically easier for a female brain. (As far as I remember, the decorous community found Dr. Brizendine’s research a male-friendly source to rely on.)
And dear “politicians”…
…sorry for yawning!..
Cards (opinions imaginable) are all the same. It’s a player who’s a swindler (feminist, communist, exhibitionist,…) or not. What, shall we call Nobel a war hawk for discovering dynamite?
Sincerely,
Comrade Natalia
November 23, 2007 at 8:52 pm
Purest vodka recipe:
– 40% medical alcohol
– 60% distilled water.
Can filter it through a slice of meteorite or modulate with Mozart, if this seems healthier. )
Bon appetit. )
November 24, 2007 at 5:17 am
What, shall we call Nobel a war hawk for discovering dynamite?
If we did that, we’d have to change the name of a world famous prize.
November 24, 2007 at 8:27 am
Natalia, thanks for your answer. I have been writing a few women from UA and RU, over the last 3 weeks. I have had a decent response to my profile on on a site where I get about 150 views per week and about 35 women writing me.
I have chosen about 8 women that I’m interested in from about 6,000 on the site. My standards are high for good reason. The others either had weak or incomplete profiles, were out of my age range of 30-44 or just not attractive. Plus I’d like to have at least one more child.
I am surprised by the number of younger women under 30 who contact me after viewing my profile. I assume many are only curious. About 3 of them have been scammers and were deleted off the site.
This is a private site where all members contact details are verified before joining and listing a profile. This means a working phone number and email that matches an address in the city where they live. I feel a little safer there than the average place. The site is 100% free for all women to join, write and recieve letters and cards so there is no one asking for money to cover cost of memberships or translating emails etc
4 or 5 women have been writing long detailed letters, answering all my question in the sequesce they were asked. They are very well educated with good jobs, excellent English skills very few mis- spelled or mis-used words.
We’ll see if anything comes of it.
Michael
November 25, 2007 at 8:07 am
Luke Skywalker “The point that I was making is even if you hate Masc and me, that still doesn’t explain DCM, and it still doesn’t explain why she’s pulling out all those feminist cards on DCM.”
Are you trying to say that I have a reason to hate you two??
November 25, 2007 at 11:40 am
Let me rephrase:
Even if you think the cards she pulls out against me and Masculist Man are justified because of things that I and Masculist Man have said and done in the past that you don’t like, that still doesn’t explain away the fact that she has pulled out the same cards on DCM when DCM has done nothing but logical and rational argumentation.
The fact that she pulls out feminist cards on a guy who has done nothing but logical and rational argumentation pretty much proves she’s a feminist.
Does that make it clearer?
December 19, 2007 at 4:00 am
The video was awesome. Where are all the women like that?
December 21, 2007 at 4:31 pm
I heard a statistic this morning that American woman are having more children than most other industrialized nations and that Russia has to pay women in order for them to even consider having more than one child. They have attibuted this “baby boom” which is a birth rate of 2.1 to; women being well educated, earning more money and having more options. Is this propoganda or are American women starting to know there place?
-Mick
January 5, 2008 at 12:38 am
Michael, my congratulations and wishes of best luck! )
Mick, it is true that time and money, as well as other social challenges to raising children, are the foremost factors that Russian women have to consider when planning a family (if they do plan). Another crucial factor is that American women rely on “120%” legal safeguards of all kinds ensurable, whereas Russian mothers stand vulnerable to “120%” risks and threats of all kinds that exist in their local environment.
Very often our women won’t afford more than one child by their reserve of physical strength, actual or estimated, and/or have all reasons to distrust healthcare standards locally available.
I remember some Russian talk show featuring a woman who agreed to come up with a refusal to have any children. The staff had difficulty finding one, and her only reason was – “Not in this country”. On the other hand, I read an article about a Ukrainian businesswoman who has abandoned success for a very needy life, driven by a desire to mother several children she has adopted. Some women reckon, “God gave the child, God would give for the child”. But the public regards them with pity for presumed carelessness and naivety.
And there are still other sides to responsibility for “giving one’s children all the best”. Since early childhood, I’ve been wondering how can a person, having only one self with one heart, manage giving all attention and love that she/he can ever give to every child of two or even more. I was the only child in the family, but I’ve known so many siblings conflicting for parents’ attitudes as well as between themselves.
Hex, the importance of context again! )) May I indulge in mental sport / lace-weaving a little bit? )
There is no “situation”. I already know the answer (I have all the answers).
It is a hypothetical demonstration of the dangers of looking into ourselves to establish righteousness and truth.
“If truth is relative, then no one is ever wrong—even when they are. As long as something is true to me, then I’m right even when I’m wrong. The drawback is that I could never learn anything either, because learning is moving from a false belief to a true one—that is, from an absolutely false belief to an absolutely true one. The truth is that absolutes are inescapable.”
If we make further use of “quotations, the prostheses of thought”, then, “to any true aphorism there is an opposite, also true”. ) What about the maxims of Graeco-Roman philosophy, that has shaped Western European civilization and was later included in the groundwork of Eastern European education: “Cognosce te ipso” and “Human is the measure of all things”? This accords with the Christian premise that man (male and female) was created in God’s image. (And yet then prohibited from knowledge of good and evil…)
Nevertheless, I heartfully agree with you, that contemplating the whole outer world inside one’s own navel is dangerous. “I know nothing except the fact of my ignorance… and many don’t know even that.”
Would envy the person who has all answers! but won’t. ) Does it leave much room for learning? I always thought that, primarily, learning is moving from available knowledge to more knowledge (which, underscorably, requires looking outside one’s framework). New knowledge is what I seek in people & books, and try to share when speaking, even if nothing is actually new beneath the Moon.
Yes, knowledge should be true, i.e. adequate to the subject matter of the information. But the subject, the world, is so multidimensional, dynamic and interconnected, that the only absolute quality in it is change, variety, and conditional determinations. Even Jesus has given an update to the Old Testament mores! And if one shalt not kill, why have there been death penalty and gun permits? )
Let alone the multitude of religions and confessions…
Maybe the only inescapable truth is the Golden Rule, “Don’t treat others the way you won’t like to be treated”. Which still has some relation to individual perceptions… 😉 but ensures conscience and fairness like no other rule.
Best regards,
Comrade Natalia